A Salvatore at Heart
by NoexcusesNoapologiesNoregrets
Summary: AU. A world where Damon and Stefan aren't bio brothers. A world where Damon is a Demon and Stefan is half Angel and half vampire. A world where each founding family is a different group of Supernatural creatures. Damon left for two years because of one 'mistake' between him and Stefan. Now he's back, along with the Mikaelson family, and life is about to get insanely complicated
1. My wayward brother

**A Salvatore at heart**

**I'd like to say that I do not own any of these characters, except the ones I create myself, or The vampire diaries in any way.**

**Alright, this is the first chapter of my new story, and basically, it's a big time AU. There will be a lot of drama, romance and supernatural stuff going on (including Angels and Demons), although the main focus of this fanfic will be Stefan and Damon's relationship.**

**If you like fanfics that create a whole new world and explore darker themes, then this is for you. Not that there won't be a good dose of humour, because there will be. **

**Also, there will be scenes of a graphic nature, both violence (death/fight scenes) and sexual (sex between characters and some…other things ;)). **

Chapter One**: '_My wayward brother_….'**

**Stefan's P.O.V**

**_I want today to be different. After months of feeling like there's no hope of life ever being good again, I want to move forward. At the very least I want to pretend that it_**** could_ be. Damon is coming home today. I don't know whether that's a good thing or not. Uncle Zack says he just wants to be here for me. He didn't come to the funeral though. Our own parent's funeral. But then, Damon's always been like that. A little selfish. He's not really a bad person, despite what some people might say, considering the way he acts most of the time. But that's the point. It is an act. There was a time when I could depend on Damon for anything, he was always there for me. But then he left two years ago and I haven't seen him since…._**

I sigh as I write the last line in my journal. Technically speaking, Damon and I aren't brothers by blood. My mother married Damon's father when I was five years old. Damon was eleven. My mother had my last name legally changed to 'Salvatore' and so pretty much everyone thinks of us as normal brothers. Sometimes it feels like that's true, but there are other times when Damon has made it perfectly clear that he resents my existence.

Four months ago our parents died when their car went over the side of WickeryBridge. I remember getting into that car, but for the life of me I cannot remember how I ended up in hospital. Someone saved me from my parent's car, but I don't know who. The doctors said I must have a guardian angel. I am not so optimistic. In real life there are no supernatural interventions.

I'm not sure how to feel about Damon coming back home after two years of nothing from him. Not even a single phone call. The worst part is, I can't help but feel at least partly responsible for why Damon has stayed away all this time. Thinking about that night still makes my heart beat accelerate instantly and my whole body heat up to a more than just extreme level.

Everything about it was wrong. And yet I have spent the last two years thinking about it almost to the point of obsession. Not that I'd ever tell Damon that. My wayward step brother would probably find it hilarious. Damon's sense of humour has always been a bit dark, as the man himself has always been a bit dark. He was a badass in school, and around town, everyone knows who Damon Salvatore is, he has one hell of a reputation.

But no one ever knew the real him, not really. Not the way I did, or at least the way I thought I did, for a long time. In truth, Damon has always had a certain power over me; he makes it hard for me to see things clearly. Damon would do bad things all the time and even though I knew they were wrong, I'd never tell on him, or stop wanting to be around my big brother. It feels strange sometimes to think of Damon as my big brother, because he very rarely acted like one. A lot of the time it was more like he was my best friend and my enemy rolled together into one relationship.

Then again, Elena has a brother and she says that Jeremy acts coldly towards her sometimes. So maybe it's just the way Damon is. I could never find the courage when I was younger to actually ask Damon if he truly cared for me or not, in a brotherly way, or in any way at all. I figured Damon would either make a joke out of it, or worse, simply answer no, that he hasn't ever cared for me.

"What are you thinking about Stef?" Caroline asks me, she flips her blond hair over her shoulder as her big eyes bore into mine.

Caroline Forbes is not only one of my best friends, but also my cousin, as my mother was Liz's younger sister. Living in such a small town means we pretty much grew up together, if anything I'd call her more my sister than my cousin. Caroline can be nosy and insensitive sometimes, but she has a heart of gold underneath it all, and I trust her with everything. Well…almost everything. Some secrets are better left inside a journal.

I shrug half heartedly, really not wanting to make a big deal out of what I'm actually thinking right now.

"Just…..Damon's coming home today"

Caroline rolls her eyes and makes a face. My cousin has never liked Damon, or more accurately, she had a huge crush on him years ago, a crush that Damon put an abrupt stop to with his blunt nature. Caroline's ego hasn't yet recovered from Damon's likely very harsh, rejection. He couldn't do things gently, not ever; it always had to be his way or nothing.

"Yeah, I know sweetie, you've mentioned it more than once in the last few hours alone" Caroline says, boredom tingeing the edges of her voice.

"Leave off Caroline" Matt chastises his girlfriend with a shake of his head, "He hasn't seen his brother in, like, years"

Caroline makes a frustrated noise,

"They're not even really brothers Matt"

"Who aren't really brothers?" Elena asks as she sits down on the grass next to me. Bonnie follows suit and gently drops to the ground.

Well now we're actually going to have talk about it. I do love Elena, but she pushes people to open up even if they don't want to. Alright, not people, me. I know she only does it because she cares about how I'm feeling, and doesn't like to think of one of her friends being in pain, but it's still really frustrating sometimes.

I try to play it off by saying,

"Don't worry about it, Caroline just asked me about Damon and me-"

"Actually I asked what he was thinking about, and he said he was thinking about **_Damon _**coming home" Caroline corrects me. Oh, she really does make it hard for me to not want to strangle her sometimes.

"You're really wound up over this Damon thing still then" Elena says with concern in her brown eyes.

Crap, that could mean anything from a consoling hug to a long talk about how I view my brother's return.

I shake my head, trying desperately to change the subject before all my friends decide to chip in with their opinions on Damon and my relationship with him.

"Seriously, I was just thinking about how weird it's gonna be to see him. That's all. I'm not upset or anything" I search for a topic that will completely throw everyone off, and eventually I think of one. I turn to Elena and ask her, "How long's your sister staying in town?"

Collectively, Caroline, Matt, Bonnie and Elena groan in unison at the mention of Elena's older sister, Katherine. She went off to college a few years ago and only usually visits on holidays and the occasional weekends.

It's our senior year in High school. I honestly can't wait to leave and get on with my life.

Katherine looks so much like Elena that it's almost eerie, but apart from their appearance, they couldn't be any more different. Everyone hates Katherine, or at least all of us hate her, even Elena most of the time. I don't like to judge, but really, Katherine is kind of a bitch.

Her and Damon had an on off relationship for years before he went away, and I'm pretty sure they left on a bad note. It's not like they were ever all that serious about each other, they both liked to date multiple people at a time. I think Damon felt something more deeply for Katherine than he let on, but I don't know exactly what happened between them.

Almost three years ago Elena's parents were killed on a hunt. They were hunters, pretty good ones actually. When MysticFalls was founded by five groups of Supernatural beings, a treaty was signed by each founding family. It was a promise that within the town limits all five families would put aside their differences and prejudices so that they could live in peace together.

The Gilbert family were Hunters, the Lockwood family were werewolves, the Forbes were Vampires, the Fells were Angels and the Salvatore's were Demons. As my mother was a Forbes and my biological father was a Fell, I am technically speaking half Angel and half vampire. I am apparently the first of my kind, which is basically another way of saying I'm a complete freak, even by supernatural standards.

It is very rare that Vampires and Angels give birth to children as they are immortal, so I am doubly freakish on that count as well. Both the Forbes and the Fells original founding family members are alive, or at least most of them are.

Elena's parents' death occurred outside of MysticFalls, as part of the peace treaty they are not allowed to hunt any of the founding family members, especially not within MysticFalls. It broke Elena when her parents died, although it seemingly had an even bigger impact on Jeremy. He went through a number of dark fazes. He even tried to kill a vampire friend of Caroline's and mine, Lexi. Luckily we stopped him or he would have been in a lot of trouble with the MysticFalls council.

Elena brushes a strand of hair behind her ear and says,

"I don't know, she's being all weird and secretive. Jeremy thinks she just flunked out of college and doesn't want to tell Aunt Jenna"

Caroline scoffs,

"I can't even believe she went to college in the first place"

We all laugh at that, mainly because none of us could really believe it when Katherine announced she was going to be attending college. And when I say announced, I mean that literally. Katherine likes to be in the spotlight, which is just one other thing that makes her and Elena to different.

I suppose in a lot of ways me and Damon are different, very different actually. But, as Caroline already pointed out, we're not technically related by blood, so our differences aren't that strange.

"I just hope she leaves before she causes any trouble in town, like last time" Bonnie states, her expression one of determination.

Bonnie is a witch, and not just any witch either, but a Bennett. She comes from a very powerful line of witches. Bonnie resisted using her magic at first, she didn't want to be dragged into other supernatural beings' problems like most witches are. But now she seems to have embraced her power, and to be fair, this is MysticFalls, nothing majorly bad ever happens here anyway.

That's probably why Damon left, he could never stand to be bored for long, it would have driven him mad to stay here. My step father's attitude probably didn't help much. He was constantly telling Damon how much of a disappointment he was to the Salvatore name. Damon would go off for days at a time in a blind rage. He almost destroyed half of the town once just because he was angry.

There are four types of Demon, and each of them have varying strengths in power. But they are all far stronger and faster than humans, or even most vampires, and some of them even have mind controlling abilities. What separates each type of Demon though, is the element they control. Damon's element is, of course, fire.

He came close to burning the boarding house down more than once. Damon is very powerful as he is from an old Italian Demon family line; the Salvatore's were one of the first and most powerful Demon families.

I am very much ignored by the Fells, they treat me like a mistake that they are forced to acknowledge. The Fells were not fond of my mother, or of Vampires in general really. Then again Angels seem to have casual disdain for anyone who is not one of them. I don't really care, as I had my mother and my step father, not to mention Aunt Liz and Caroline, to raise and care for me.

I can't say I had a bad childhood, there were some troubling times, but I think that's true of all families.

Caroline looks thoroughly irritated now. Both the mention of Damon and Katherine is obviously putting her on edge. Or not being the centre of attention is; sometimes it's hard to tell with my cousin.

"Are you gonna bring Damon to the Grill tonight?" Matt asks me, bringing me right back to a topic I really didn't want to deal with.

I think it over for a moment, and decide that once again I have no idea what type of person Damon is now. He can't have changed that much right? All I know is he's apparently bringing a friend back with him. I just hope it's not a girlfriend, I really don't want to have that to think about and drive myself crazy over too.

I shrug in response to Matt's question

"Uncle Zach wants us to have dinner I think, to welcome Damon back properly"

Elena snorts out a laugh,

"I don't think Damon's gonna go for that. He was never the family dinner type"

Caroline adds,

"He wasn't really the family anything type. That's why he-"

"Made a break for it" Matt finishes with a smile.

Elena laughs,

"Damon Salvatore's great escape!"

I can't help but feel a dark cloud pass over me at that, even though I know they're only joking. Not for the first time in the last two years, I have to ask myself, what was it that Damon felt he needed to escape from? His father? The thought of being stuck in MysticFalls forever? Or, was he running from…..**_me_**?

**_Thank you so much for reading, please let me know if you liked this chapter and would like me to continue writing this story! xxx_**


	2. Raised in hell

_**I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx**_

Chapter two:**'**_**Raised in hell'**_

**Damon's P.O.V**

"Mystic Falls? Really? This place actually exists?" Ric questions dryly.

I barely refrain from rolling my eyes. Unfortunately, Mystic Falls does very much exist, maybe if it didn't, my life would be a lot easier.

"Where did you think I actually came from? Narnia?" I say, my tone holding every bit of sarcasm I could possibly get into it.

Ric shrugs at me, and then he smiles, a teasing glint in his eyes,

"Hell"

I do roll my eyes at that,

"You're not completely wrong. Mystic Falls is a lot like Hell, just with more _dancing_"

"You are a Demon. It's not a stretch for most people you know" Ric leans back in his sit and observes me. He's incredibly annoying. It pisses me off when he watches me like I'm an exhibit at a museum, and that's why he does it.

"_Most people_, are morons" is all I say in response.

"Ah, there you go with that anti social behaviour again. What would your father say?" Ric smarts, his eyebrow raised in amusement.

"Fuck off Hunter. If you'd rather not come with me, I could always leave you by the side of the road"

"Nah, too late now, we've already crossed over to the dark side"

"We just passed the 'Welcome to Mystic Falls' sign Ric, don't get too prophetic about it"

"'Welcome to the gates of Hell'. Same thing"

I ignore that comment. In fact I ignore Alaric Saltzman's presence completely, tuning him out whilst I think over one last time why I'm even here. I left Mystic Falls two years ago, and had no intention of ever coming back. But, of course, just as things were going well for me, my father and his piece of fang went and died. From an accident no less.

How one car accident managed to kill a very powerful Demon and a vampire, is a question I want the answer to. I don't owe my father anything, but I'm still a Salvatore, and Mystic Falls is my home. I won't allow someone, or something, to destroy that.

Plus, Stefan is here.

One more reason to stay away. And one more reason to make sure everything is a'ok in Mystic Falls. I have to make sure Stefan is safe: he's the only thing in this town worth caring about.

When I pull up outside the boarding house a rush of memories attempts to invade my mind. But I don't let them. The last thing I need is to be reminded of why I left in the first place.

Most disturbing to me is that everything looks the same as it did when I left, even though I know that can't possibly be true. I have a feeling the inside of my old home will not have changed either. Father was always very particular about how he liked things to be.

For a Demon, his craving for chaos and destruction was very well maintained. Mine on the other hand, was not. I believe that father felt most offended by my inability to control the strength of my own power when I felt intense emotions. He saw it as a weakness. Salvatore's are not meant to have weaknesses.

"So, little rich boy, are we just gonna stare at the house all day, or go inside?" Ric asks, bringing me out of my darker thoughts.

I shrug and without replying I get out of the car. Ric follows me up to the front door, and with great reluctance I ring the bell. My key went missing a long time ago, and I didn't think much of it considering I never wanted to come back.

Actually, that's a lie. _Wanting_ to come back, was never the problem. I _wanted_ a lot of things. But it was for that exact reason why I could not return to Mystic Falls.

There are too many ghosts here; and not in the literal sense. I am not a Necromancer, thank fuck, I'll leave that kind of rubbish to the Hunters and Angels.

_**Angels. Oh God. **_I'll have to deal with those arrogant oh so saintly dicks again. Pigeons with halos, that's all they are. I can't be bothered with their shit anymore. If one of them tries anything, I'll be having fried pigeon for lunch.

Angels are the most self righteous assholes on the planet, and the thought of even attempting to co-exist in a town where the Fells live, is absurd to me. To any Demon, it would be considered an insult to have to associate with Angels, our natural enemy. They hate us, we hate them, that's how it damn well should be in my opinion if the Fells are anything to go by.

When Uncle Zach opens the door I struggle to keep my internal groan from becoming a real one.

Zach was my father's younger brother. I've never liked him, even as a child I knew he was a twit. Father and Zach didn't get on well either, although that was mainly because Zach was born a Kazir, which means he was born without the ability to control fire, or any element at all.

In pureblood Demon culture that is not accepted, and was in fact punishable by death. In the old world Zach would have been killed or at the very least imprisioned many years ago. Of course these days such things are far less brutal considering pureblood family members continue to procreate with other species.

Father was a fan of the old ways.

I was taught my father's prejudices of course, but luckily I took my rebellious side very seriously and rejected all his idealisms. Ignorance is a dangerous thing, and I don't have time for it.

I still hate Angels though, but that's because most of them are snotty up themselves self-important asshats, not because of any old fued between species.

Zach smiles at me in the same way a rabbit might smile at a wolf. I see fear in his eyes, which is ridiculous. I have no reason to hurt him. Yet. Cowardice is another thing my father could not abide; something I now agree with full heartedly, which is why Zach's uneasy smile is annoying me so much.

"Please come in Damon" Zach says after a pause I'm sure we both found incredibly uncomfortable.

I frown at him, and just to set him even more on edge I say,

"Thank **you, **for inviting me into my own house"

I walk past him before he can stutter out some sort of stupid apology. All I can think is that there had better be something going on this town, or I'm going to get bored and end up killing my own Uncle just to entertain myself.

Alaric follws after me and I tune them both out as Alaric and Zach introduce themselves. I suppose if I was a polite decent human being then I would have introduced Ric to my Uncle and vice versa. I am none of those things, luckily for me. I am sure I would make an awful human. They have this strange thing called a conscience. It's inside their own minds. If anything Ric is my concience, in the way that he stops me from doing insane and dangerous things, when he can.

There is only one other person in this world who could stop me from going over the edge; Stefan. My saintly step brother would give me this look, it was so innocent and pleading. I'd do anything to make him stop **looking** at me like that damn him. Not that Stefan would ever understand that as he is so oblivious of himself sometimes. It used to drive me crazy how he couldn't see how much power he had over others, even without using any of his actual _**Angelic**_ power.

The little...he had power over _**me**_. And _no one_ has power over me. I would never allow them to. But Stefan was...different. It's not something I could ever fully explain. Stefan had a presence like no one else in this world, and there were times when I hated him for it.

From the very first moment we met, Stefan captivated me. Angels are always quite compelling and undeniably beautiful. Inhumanly beautiful actually. But with Stefan it was more than that. It was like his beauty radiated from inside him, a pure white hot light that came from within his soul and reached out to me.

I move in through the house and realise I was not wrong. This house hasn't changed, not by one inch.

Ric and Zach are busy talking about something I couldn't give a shit about, and so I don't follow them into the living room. Ric gives me a look over his shoulder and shrug noncommitally. He narrows his eyes, but makes no comment. That's the thing I like best about Ric, he doesn't ask stupid questions he knows full well I won't answer.

I decide to take our bags up to my room, so I go back out to the car. It's when I close the boot, two bags in hand, that I sense his presence.

Stefan.

I drop the bags and move around the car so I can see him. Stefan is standing with his arms crossed defensively over his broad chest. Those emerald eyes sparking with something I can no longer read. It seems Stefan has indeed done quite a bit of growing up in the two years that I've been away.

The sight of him is enough to send a shiver of anticipation that I have no right to feel, down my spine.

I shake it off when Stefan's gaze narrows, like he's trying to read me.

Screw that.

"You know, you can have a broody expression on your face when you stare at me, or you can have your hair gelled to stiff perfection, but having both is a bit overkill Stef" I say drolly.

Stefan's suspicious frown turns into a full on grin as he replies,

"You haven't changed at all have you Day"

I can't help but smirk back at that, and I shake my head,

"I promised I wouldn't, remember?"

Stefan's smile falters a bit, but he doesn't let it throw him off completely because he still answers soberly,

"Yeah, I remember"

"You've changed though" I say, wanting to take that look of sadness off of his face, the beautiful frustrating idiot.

Stefan arches an eyebrow in interest and says,

"You think so?"

My smirk just gets wider,

"You're definitely taller, and your forehead has grown even more broody looking. Have you been reading those deep big boy books again?"

"I'm not a child anymore Damon" Stefan snaps, as if he wants to make that particularly clear to me.

I know why, although I wish I didn't. But wishing is for humans, and I have no intention of pretending to be one of them to please any one else, not even Stefan. Especially Stefan.

I shrug uncarlingly,

"You'll always be a baby to me. Little Angel Steffy"

Stefan looks hurt for a moment, which is what I intended. The last thing I need is more drama with Stefan. Even though he's right. Stef isn't a kid anymore, I can tell that just by the way he stands and looks at me. He's more self assured, more confident, more...everything. But letting Stefan know I think that couldn't end well for anyone, especially Stefan.

"Screw you Damon" is all Stef spits out though, before he storms inside our home loudly. I predict a slammed door. Nice to know I can still get under his skin. My little Angel Steffy. He used to love that nickname, although back then I didn't use it to mock him, I used it to tease him, to make him smile.

I slam my fist against the car, causing a very noticeable dent.

Damn it, I need a fucking drink!

_**Please, let me know if you enjoyed this chapter. I'd really like to continue this story, so let me know if you want to read more! xxx**_

_**Thanks you for reading! xxx**_


	3. Welcoming the Mikaelson's'

**_I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx_**

Chapter three: _**'Welcoming the Mikaelson's'**_

**Stefan's P.O.V**

Why does he always have to be so…..so…._**.Damon**_?

Even worse, why the hell do I keep letting him get under my skin like this? We aren't children anymore. I'm eighteen years old damn it, Damon should not hold the same power over me that he did two years ago. I thought I'd be able to talk with him like we were old friends. But I guess I was fooling myself.

I almost fuck right over when I see Uncle Zach having a drink with a man I've never seen before. This must be Damon's friend. He looks….like a Hunter. His eyes lock on mine, and there's an awkwardness to his stare, he seems to almost twitch with anticipation.

Yep, he's definitely a Hunter.

There different types of Hunters, although most of them hunt Demons and Vampires as they are the most immediate threat to humanity. Although you will find the occasional werewolf hunter who's family have been torn apart by the wild beasts during a full moon.

There are even a few 'Specialists'. They hunt Angels. Usually Hunters who go after Angels have had personal experience with what the Angels themselves call 'The Fallen'; these are Angels who have been _**cast out**_ by their family, by means of an old world ritual. During the ritual an Angels wings are torn from their body, and their Grace is taken along with it. An Angel without wings or a Grace lose their mind, some slower than others, but all of 'The Fallen' eventually go mad.

I might even be one of them if I was a pureblood Angel, although if I was then they'd have little reason to shun me in the first place. An Angel's wings cannot be seen by anyone who is not an Angel, unless the Angel reveals themselves purposely, which is strictly forbidden.

This Hunter looks ordinary enough, quite plain really. Actually, that might just be the jealousy talking. I can't deny that part of me hates how close this man and Damon must be for Damon to bring him here. To trust him like that. Damon does not trust easily, this man must have proven himself worthy in some way.

I wish I could just ask Damon, but I know he'd never tell me outright, especially if he knew how much it matters to me. He'd probably see it as me digging for information on where he's been all this time. He's a paranoid crazy person, but there's not much I can do about that.

There's also not much I can do about the irrational anger I feel towards this stranger. It's not _**his**_ fault that Damon trusts him more than me. It's not _**his**_ fault that Damon left me alone, scarring me for life in a way I'm pretty sure he's not even aware of. It's not _**his**_ fault that there was a tiny part of me that hoped Damon would come back and…see me as more than just his annoying little step brother who he's been forced to put up with.

But, as it is with life sometimes, just because you rationalise something in your head doesn't mean you can control how you actually _**feel. **_So yeah, I'm kind of wanting to hit this random guy right now, and it's all Damon's fault. That's not fair, and I _**know**_ that, I really do, but I don't care. Or I should say, my heart doesn't give a shit that it's being irrational. It never does.

Which is why there are so many love related murders.

Not that I'm going to kill this Hunter, that would be a little dramatic even for me and Damon. We've had enough drama in our lives as it is. I remember one family dinner when Damon invited Katherine round, basically just to piss off his dad. My step father did not approve of Katherine, which was probably the main reason Damon went out of his way to be with her.

Anyway, that dinner was a disaster. Katherine put on the charm as usual, so much so that she was practically flirting with Damon's dad right in front of Damon. It makes me squirm just remembering how awkward it was for us. By 'us', I mean me and my mother. All we could do was sit there and watch as Katherine set out to prove once and for all that she was fine with playing the role of the bitch.

I had to wonder afterwards if that was the plan from the beginning; I wouldn't put it past Damon and Katherine to purposely make everyone else uncomfortable just because they would find it funny. Damon sat back the whole time with a half amused smirk on his face. Sometimes my step brother does things that make no sense to me. His 'Damon logic' is beyond what I can comprehend.

Katherine understood though. She may be a bitch, and they may have fought all the time like they hated each other, but in truth, Damon and Katherine had an understanding I know I will probably never have with Damon.

"Ah, you must be the Angel I've heard so much about" the Hunter says after a strangely tense pause.

I meet his stare head on and shrug lightly,

"Only half Angel"

The Hunter moves forward and holds out his hand to me,

"From what Damon's told me of Angels, that's probably a good thing"

Oh yes, Damon hates Angels, just one more reason to feel insecure in his presence. Does he hate me? Does he hate just…part of me? Is that even possible?

I try to push those thoughts from my mind and I look down at the Hunter's hand passively. If he expects me touch him, then he really doesn't know anything about Angels.

Angels have many abilities, and the strength of each Angel definitely varies. Some of us have the power of teleportation, others telekinesis, which is moving object with your mind. Most Angels can read other people's thoughts, emotions and even view memories from inside a person's mind. A really skilled Angel can manipulate those memories, they can warp them into something else entirely. A power like that is dangerous, because it can change a person's whole life, or at least the way they think of it. Angels can also speak into each others minds.

All Angels can communicate with the dead, touch them even. But only very powerful Angels can bring people back from the dead. And there's always a price. The world must be in balance, so to bring a life back, another must be taken.

Angels only have one weakness, which is a blade made out of obsidian that must be dipped in the blood of someone who is pure of heart and soul. Angels have destroyed most of the obsidian rock on earth, there is a very limited supply left, which is why there are so few Angel Hunters.

I'm not ultimately sure if an obsidian blade would affect me the way it does all other Angels. Or if a wooden stake would do the job just fine. To be honest I really hope I never have to find out. My mother used to say I should be safe as long as I stay in Mystic Falls. But I can't stay here all my life. I'm immortal, so all my life could mean for the rest of eternity, and that's a really long time if you consider forever actually meaning_** forever**_.

I arch an eyebrow at the Hunter and finally he drops his hand. The reason I won't touch his hand is because I have rare 'gift'. A horrible one really. As I said before, Angels have many abilities, but some have special powers. I have a power that is….apparently very extraordinary. Only a handful of Angels have ever been able to do what I can do. Basically, if I touch people, I see their death. I see the date, the time, how it'll happen and why.

Now, a lot of Angels can see into the future. But my power is specific to other people's death. It doesn't matter what species they are, if I touch them, then I'll see their death. I hate it, I really do. I don't like knowing how all the people I love are going to die. My mother said I could ask the Fell family how to block my powers, and therefore block my 'gift', but I didn't want to go to them for help. Besides, they've all but publically shunned me since I was born, I hardly think they'd help me now.

I've just had to learn to live with it.

Ironically.

"My name's Alaric" the Hunter tries after another tense pause between us.

I know Zach is giving me his disapproving parent look, but I can't be bothered to care about that right now. I don't want to upset him though, so I force myself to smile at this stranger and nod politely,

"Stefan"

Before another awkward pause can descend on us, my phone starts to ring, and I thank mercy, and whoever's just called me. With another swift nod, I rush from the room to answer the phone. No wanting to be caught by Damon in the corridor, I go up to my room. Only once I have closed my door, do I actually answer the phone.

It's Kol.

"Hey Kol, what's up?" I say, a smile forming on my face despite everything.

I can practically hear Kol's shrug before he answers,

"_**Nothing much. They're all being mental. And Nick's being an arsehole again. I thought when we moved here, away from father and mother, that he would calm down a bit, but Rebekah just keeps pushing him"**_

I almost roll my eyes, he's so full of it sometimes,

"Oh yeah, because you **never** do that"

Kol laughs down the phone at me,

"_**Guilty as charged love. Do you want to come over tonight, or are you having some brotherly bonding time?"**_

Kol Mikaelson is part of the new Demon family that have just moved here recently about four months ago from England. The Mikaelson's are well known for being one of, if not _**the**_, first Demon family to escape from the Underworld, where legend dictates they rose from.

Apparently there was a rebellion in the Demon world, a.k.a. the Underworld, many, many, _**many**_ years ago, where the Demons fought back against the Gods. They were eventually granted their freedom, but at a price, they would be watched over by the Angels for as long as they remained on earth. The Demons resented their freedom being restricted, so they started a blood war with the Angels that rages on to this very day.

It could be just a story, I mean, it happened thousands of years ago. No one can really know the truth.

There are seven Mikaelson siblings who now live in Mystic Falls. Aaron, who is the eldest, and quite possibly the most handsome man alive, and the most stoic. He's head of the family, and pretty much has the final word on everything. Then there's Elijah, who is almost startlingly calm and composed, he is definitely the peace maker in the family. He's also engaged to Hayley. Finn is the third eldest, he has a wife named Sage, who is a vampire. They have a young son named Alexander.

Then, of course, there's Nicklaus, who is part Demon and part vampire. He's pretty touchy, but can be fun when he's not pissed off, which is most of the time. He likes art though, and his paintings really are impressive, or at least the ones I've seen are. He can be even more arrogant that Damon ever was, which is really saying something, but I do like him. The fifth eldest is Kol, who's a bit wild. He only started school about three months ago, but he's already pretty popular. He's handsome, funny, charming, and the accent doesn't hurt either, so it's not exactly surprising that he's become so well liked in such a short time.

The sixth Mikaelson is Rebekah, she's beautiful, free-spirited and feisty as all hell. Her and Nicklaus are pretty close from what I've seen. Rebekah started school the same time as Kol, although they don't spend much time together. They're both so outspoken, and I've seen them clash on quite a few occasions.

It's actually a bit complicated really, because Elijah is engaged to Haley, a werewolf from an old family, who used to be with Nicklaus. In fact she's having his baby. So…it's a little weird. I don't know if I could handle that much drama in one house. Well, not so much _**a house**_, but the biggest mansion in Mystic Falls.

Henrik is the youngest Mikaelson, and he's in the same year as Jeremy. He's very quiet and mysterious, and he seems to have struck up a friendship with the youngest Gilbert. I actually have a sneaking suspicion that he's got a crush on Elena, but there's no way I'm telling her that.

Kol says that Aaron decided to move the family away from their parents, because friction was becoming too much. They only recently found out that Nicklaus is half vampire, which means their mother cheated on their father.

Vampires are born in a sort of transitional state. Only when they die, do they become actual vampires. Nickaus was killed by a Hunter, and then came back as a vampire, much to his whole family's surprise. Rebekah told me that her father can be stubborn and too proud for his own good.

The Mikaelson family's arrival in Mystic Falls has received mixed responses by many. But after a council meeting Aaron, as head of his family, signed a new treaty that would mean they are now part of the community, and as such would follow the laws originally set out by the Founders of Mystic Falls.

I snort out a laugh,

"No, I think brotherly bonding is officially _**off**_ the table"

Kol asks me in his 'concerned' tone,

"_**Are you alright mate? I know you were a bit…worried about your brother coming back"**_

I sigh heavily, not at all sure how to answer. I lean back against my door.

"I'm alright, really, I just didn't know what to expect. And it's….it's not…. But I'm _fine_."

"_**Ohhh, that bad huh?"**_

I'm still not sure how to answer so I just say in a muted voice,

"Maybe"

"_**Well, then, maybe you need to take a night off mate, and come over here. I promise it's not as bad as last time"**_

I frown even though he can't see me,

"Thought you said it was all kicking off"

Kol makes a frustrated sound and explains,

"_**Right, well, basically, Nick and Hayley got into a fight about the baby, and then Elijah got all protective of his future wife yadda yadda yadda. Of course then Nick got all defensive because…well because he's Nick, and he just has to blow up about every-sodding-thing. Rebekah started to kick up a fuss about her birthday party next week, and Sage argued with her because apparently she stole one of Sage's jumpers or skirts or….something from her closet anyway. Henrik was being a little shit too, he was arguing with **__**Alexander about something stupid. But **__**then Aaron came in and got them all to shut the hell up, finally"**_

"Better than last time then" I say honestly.

Kol huffs out a laugh again,

"_**Yeah, at least there were no Demon duels or ice monsters this time"**_

I'm about to reply when suddenly I hear Kol fighting with someone over the phone. There's another voice that sounds suspiciously like Rebekah's, who is shouting at Kol, calling him a 'horny twat', and Kol shouting back something along the lines of 'get off you virgin prat princess'. I try not to get involved in Mikaelson arguments, it only ends badly if you try to intervene in any way.

Eventually I hear a loud thump, and then silence, before Rebekah's voice comes down the phone to me,

"_**So, are you coming over or not? You should. He'll pout all night if you don't"**_

"_**FUCK OFF REBEKAH" **_Kol shouts somewhere in the distance.

I start laughing, I can't help it, they're all so insane. Staying at the Mikaelson's is like crossing over into a alternate dimension where all the rules are different. I always have fun there, even if I am almost killed at least five times when I end up in the crossfire between the Mikaelson siblings.

I answer Rebekah's question though, feeling that Kol is right, I do need to have a breather before I see Damon again,

"Yeah, ok, I'll come over. Just don't kill each other before I get there"

In unison I hear my two new friends say,

"_**No promises"**_

_**...**_

_**Special shout out to-**__**Enchanted Hybrid**__**, **__**BroodyCheery323**__**, **__**Frozen862**__** and Guests who have left reviews-I bloody love you my peoples. I really like reading what you think, it makes me so happy to know that you like my stuff, or that you're just reading it at all. So please continue to give me reviews, because it means so much! Xxx**_

_**Right, so there was a lot of information in this chapter, I hope I explained it all ok, if you have any questions do not hesitate to ask. **_

_**The Mikaelson's are going to play a big part in this story, even bigger than I first thought when I started writing actually. Please let me know if you like it. Also, I want you all to know that I won't just be writing from Damon and Stefan's pov's, all the characters will get their screen time, especially the Mikaelson's. I know I said this story will center around Damon and Stefan's relationship, and it will, but I'm also excited about writing about othet stuff too (mostly to do with the Mikaelson's).**_

_**Please feel free to comment, or give advice, or make suggestions, I welcome it ALL! ;) **_

_**Thank you so much for reading! xxx**_


	4. Sit on it and spin Kitty Kat'

**_I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx_**

_Alright, so gonna have a bit of Mikaelson action here. As I said before, it turns out that the Mikaelson's are going to have a bigger part to play in this story than I anticipated. But there's Stefan and Damon stuff too, so don't worry ;) xxx_

Chapter four: _**'Sit on it and spin Kitty Kat'**_

**Kol's P.O.V**

"He said he's coming Kol, you staring out the window like that just makes you look like a desperate weirdo" Rebekah mocks annoyingly.

"Fuck off Becksly" I growl impatiently, although I know she's right. I am staring out the window like a desperate weirdo.

It's just that, since moving here, the only person who has truly caught my attention is Stefan Salvatore. At first, when Aaron declared that we were moving to Mystic Falls, I hated the very idea of it. We lived in London for Christ sakes, we couldn't move_** here, **_to this tiny ridiculous town.

I argued against it, but as usual, Aaron had already made his decision without consulting any of us, and unless I wanted to stay behind with Mother and Father, which would have been a fate worse than death, I had to come. Not that it's completely awful here exactly, but the people are definitely just as small town as I expected. Or at least, most of them are.

Stefan Salvatore fascinates me, and I can't say why really. He's handsome, of course, but so many men are. As he is half Angel, it is conceivable that my reason for being drawn to him could be his Angel blood. It calls to me, strangely enough. He's got a pure soul, that's what Finn says. Mother would probably say the same thing.

Demons very rarely have souls that are anything but dark. We seek to destroy and cause chaos. It is our greatest weakness and our most dangerous quality. Living a quiet life is not an option for most Demons as the need to make trouble is almost undeniable. I reckon the only reason this town has survived so long with Demon's in residence is because the Salvatore's are an old Demon family. Dignified and restrained, just like my family should be. We are the Mikaelson's after all, everyone, both Demon and not, know who we are.

Father was strict on rules of behaviour. I never cared much for behaving in any way but badly.

Nicklaus acted out more than all of us when he was a teenager, but that could have been because Father hated him. He hated him then, and he hates him even more now. That's why we had to leave. Father and Nicklaus would have killed each other if we'd stayed.

I do love my brother, even if he is half vampire. And a complete tosser sometimes.

"You know, if you want to get in his pants, then you're going to have to be more direct about it. He's obviously completely oblivious to how attractive he is" Rebekah tries to needle me again.

I ignore the anger bubbling up in my gut and I reply calmly,

"I have no idea what you're talking about little sister. Now kindly, **back off**"

Rebekah rolls her eyes at me,

"Oh, come off it Kol. I see the way you_** stare**_ at him. It's weird. Even Aaron knows you fancy the Angel halfy, and you know Aaron rarely cares about things like that enough to notice them"

"I don't fancy him Rebekah. I just…..find him…..interesting" I snap in irritation.

Rebekah snorts and shakes her head,

"You find the insides of his boxers interesting, you perv"

I throw a book at my sister and she very ungracefully falls off of her chair. Ha, she's so out of tune with her Demon senses and abilities. Any one of my brothers would have sensed that a mile off, even Henrik. Oh, God, Henrik. He's becoming so frustrating in his old age. Actually, he's a bloody pain in the arse these days. I don't know what turning sixteen did to my brother, but it's definitely done something. Henrik is so secretive, I mean, he's always been a rather private person, but it's gotten worse since we moved here and he started spending so much time with the two youngest Gilbert siblings.

I blame the sodding Hunters, they always cause problems. They think it's their right to go around killing my kind, whether the Demon did anything destructive or not to deserve being hunted. A Hunter murdered my brother, that's the whole reason why we found out about Nick being part vampire in the first place. If he hadn't been killed then it's possible Father never would have known his reasons for disliking Nick were actually well founded.

I laugh at my sister and dodge a ball of ice that she sends my way, it creates a hole in the wall behind my head. I snicker and say,

"Elijah is going to be pissed about that. He might even cancel your party just to teach you about responsibility"

Rebekah scoffs,

"What, like he did when he took away your phone _**and**_ your credit cards for a whole month when you were thirteen"

I shrug,

"I learnt how to deal without them, most of our kind do"

My sister huffs indignantly,

"Ugh, you're so…**human** sometimes. We aren't just any Demon family you** idiot**, we're Demon royalty, we shouldn't _**scrounge**_ like the rest of them. It's undignified. Didn't you listen to anything Mother and Father taught us"

I roll my eyes dismissively,

"I was busy doing fun things, you know, like having friends, going to parties, having_** sex**_" I add the last one just to see my sister squirm.

Rebekah gets up off the floor in one swift movement and glides out of the room with another huff of superiority aimed in my direction.

Huh, my baby sister is so easy to tease. We're close enough in age that our parents forced us to do most everything together, we got sick of each others company pretty damn quickly. Not that Mother noticed, she still insisted that we spend more time together than any two siblings should have to edure.

Moments later I see Stefan coming up the long drive to my family's mansion. He walks strangely, in fact I think the way he moves was what first attracted me to him. Stefan moves like he's part of the air around him. Most people move as if the world revolves around them, Stefan appears to move as if he is part of the world itself, as if he is working _**with **_it as the world's equal, and not just being permitted to live upon it like the rest of us. I think that's definitely an Angel thing.

I rush to answer the door and groan when I see that Aaron has got there first. My eldest brother arches an eyebrow at me before opening the door to reveal a patiently waiting Stefan. Stefan blinks in surprise at Aaron and asks hesitantly,

"Hey….is….uh….is Kol here?"

I know that to other people Aaron may seem really intimidating. He's well over six foot, broad chested, and has eyes that are actually the colour gold, they always seem to pierce into you with stark intensity. Aaron's dark brown hair is almost black, and it curls at the ends when he lets it grow longer. I also know that my eldest brother is considered incredibly handsome, although Aaron seems to be unaware of that fact.

All of my friends have had a hard time talking properly when Aaron is around, the power that surrounds him is quite daunting. As the eldest in our family, Aaron is our father's heir and therefore has the most power out of all of us. Something my brother Niklaus and my sister Rebekah resent wholeheartedly.

I come into Stefan's view and he noticeably relaxes. Aaron gestures half heartedly at me and drawls,

"I don't know" his eyes fix on me, "Are you here Kol? Or should I tell your new….'friend'…that you're in a meeting, like Elijah did with your last…'friend'"

I narrow my eyes at him,

"Don't be a prick A"

Aaron doesn't react much further than turning back to Stefan and saying,

"Kol's here, apparently. Play nicely boys" then he pretty much vanishes with a flick of his wrist. God, my brother's abilities are cool.

"Come on then mate, don't stand out there all night" I say when Stefan seems content to just stand on my doorstep.

Stefan smiles sadly as if there's something weighing him down,

"Can I talk to you about something?" he asks suddenly, a spark flashing in his bright green eyes.

**Katherine's P.O.V**

Bitch.

"Shut up Katherine, give me back my diary" Elena whines.

Ugh, she's so annoying.

"But I'm not finished reading it yet _**Elena**_" I reply, crossing my legs whilst lying back on my bed.

"That's my private stuff" Elena makes a grab for the diary, and I move it out of her reach.

"Oh my God Elena, do you have a thing for the younger Salvatore brother? You mention him, like, on every other page. That's so pathetic, he's definitely gay you know" I taunt, and Elena screams dramatically in frustration before making another dive for her diary.

I jump up on the bed, Elena follows after me, still trying to grab the diary. I hold it out of her reach again as I read it aloud, putting on a dreamy girl's voice, "_'I saw Henrik today. He was in our kitchen, with Jeremy as usual. Those two are attached at the hip or something. Although, I swear sometimes Henrik looks at me like I'm the only person in the world. He's so mysterious, but I know he's kind and thoughtful. Maybe I should get to know him better'_"

I laugh hard at that last bit,

"Oh fuck, Elena, you fancy one of Jer's friend's, that's even **more** pathetic"

Elena tackles me, causing us both to fall off the bed and land hard on the floor. Thanks to our Hunter cat –like reflexes, I manage to flip myself just in time to land on my feet. Elena sprawls on the floor and I sniff at her in disgust,

"You're freaking useless Elena, no wonder mom and dad never trained you properly like they did me and Jer"

My little sister flinches at that and I fight the urge to roll my eyes. She's so easy, and weak. I drop the diary in her lap and sweep out of my room. I just read in Elena's diary that Damon Salvatore is back in town today. There's no harm in paying an old friend a visit.

Aunt Jenna is out with Jeremy and Henrik, watching a movie. They invited me and Elena along, but the thought of spending that much time with my family made me want to scream. Not that I hate Jeremy or Jenna, Elena pisses me off, but I don't hate her, I just don't like playing happy families with them all the time. It's tedious and boring.

I drive to the boarding house in search of my old friend, and it doesn't take me long to find him since he's sitting outside on the hood of what I assume is his car. I park close to him and get out. Damon must have sensed me coming because he doesn't take any notice of my arrival. Arrogant asshole. That was always Damon's problem, he doesn't look hard enough at the big picture.

I jump up onto the hood next to Damon. I watch his face for a while. His eyes tell me that he's in his own world at the moment, far away from all the shit he's probably dealing with right now.

I never expected to see Damon Salvatore again. He left soon after revealing to me what he had done. I'd seen it coming, I think most people would have if they'd been able to look beyond the surface. Stefan had a crush on Damon since….I don't even know, since forever from what I can tell. Although, I know Damon only started to return those feelings 'in that way', about a year before he left.

It is true that Stefan stopped looking like a kid at the age of fifteen, in fact, if he'd been a few years older, I'd have fallen for him myself. Poor Damon never stood a chance of resisting the half Angel. It didn't help that Stefan exuded a natural aura of goodness. There is no doubt in my mind that Stefan is good to the core. He's a better person than either me or Damon could ever hope to be, that's for sure.

I understood why Damon felt he had to leave, he would have destroyed both himself, and the half Angel if he'd stayed. I still think he should have just taken what he wanted from the kid, and then left. It would have cut the cord more viciously, and Stefan wouldn't have been left pining for someone he'd be better off without.

But Damon has never listened to me, it's a point of pride with him actually. He'd disagree with me just to spite me, which is fair enough. I've never treated him well. But I taught him how to use his passion, and how to truly feel it. So, I figure he owes me, even if he'd never admit that.

"You coming back is a mistake" is all I say. It's the truth and he knows it.

Damon frowns, but he doesn't look at me as he replies smoothly,

"Shouldn't you be knocking boots with college goers? Don't tell me they ran out of one dollar bills to throw at you."

I roll my eyes,

"Very clever Demon boy, at least they know what they're doing, unlike some people I could mention"

Damon snorts dismissively,

"I rocked your world every. Single. Time. And you know it"

I laugh, unable to help myself. I can't say I haven't missed Damon for the last two years, he's the only man I've ever been able to be myself around because he doesn't judge. He never has.

"Have you seen him?" and I know that Damon knows exactly who I mean.

Damon shrugs,

"He's not a fucking kid anymore. I hate that"

"You love that" I whisper suggestively in his ear.

"Sit on it an spin Kitty Kat, I don't need this bullshit from you too" Damon growls angrily, his voice going all deep and threatening. I remember that voice all too well.

"You need to let go. He'll only drag you under. It's not worth it" I try, because I really don't believe it is worth it.

Damon rubs the heel of his hand against his forehead as if fighting of a migraine. Finally he says, sounding more defeated than I've ever heard him,

"He's…shit…..I just can't_** look**_ at him anymore. I don't wanna be dealing with it. I just need to figure out what happened to my father, and then get the hell out of this motherfucking town"

"Just leave for fucks sake Damon, you don't owe your father shit. Get out now, before you screw everything up. Because if you stay, you know you will" I reach out and touch Damon's arm, he doesn't stop me so I keep it there.

Damon shakes his head, resigned to his fate,

"It's not that simple. I won't leave him here if it's not safe. The whole God damned point of this fucking town is keeping Stefan safe. If it can't even do that, then me and the council are gonna have a real problem"

"You'll fuck him" I warn uselessly.

He already knows all that full well.

"_**I**_ _**won't"**_ Damon says firmly.

I scoff loudly,

"Bull. Shit. You don't even believe the words coming out of your own mouth Damon. You turned him away once, and we both know your self restraint is practically zero. There's no way you'll be able to do it again"

"He's not a kid anymore" is all Damon says in reply, then he bends down to pick up a bottle of half finished bourbon and offers it to me after taking a massive swallow of his own. I take it.

Well, fuck life then.

**Stefan's P.O.V**

"Woah, that's pretty heavy mate….jesus, no wonder you were freaking out about it" Kol exclaims, still in shock from what I've just told him.

I had to talk to someone about Damon, and I figure the only person in my life right now who won't judge me, is Kol, since he's not used to thinking of me and Damon as brothers like everyone else is.

I shrug and lay back alongside Kol on his big king sized bed.

"I don't know how to handle him being back in my life Kol. How do I even act around him?"

Kol turns to me, his expression still trying to work out what it wants to be,

"Fuck, just be yourself Stefan, it sounds like he's not brothered, so maybe you shouldn't be either"

"But I **_am_** bothered" I groan in exasperation.

"Then...like...pretend" Kol says awkwardly, he doesn't seem at all comfortable with giving me advice, which is fair enough. It is a pretty messed up situation.

I rub my eyes, hoping I'll be hit in the face by some sort of weird-ass epiphany.

"Sure, I'll just go around pretending not to be attracted to my own step brother! That'll be easy" I say sarcastically.

"No offense mate, but he sounds like a bit of an arsehole to me" Kol says carefully.

I can't help the huff of laughter that escapes,

"Oh, yeah, he is. Big time"

Kol smirks at me then,

"So, got a thing for the bad boys, huh? Honestly Stef, i wouldn't have pegged you for the type"

I feel myself blush like a twelve year old girl, and I hate that. For hells sake, Damon must think I'm such a stupid kid. What kind of fully grown male adult blushes for Christs sake? No wonder he'd never be interested in me.

And anyway, even if by some miracle he was interested in screwing his baby brother, what would that make us? Is it incest or not? Is it right or not? Could I survive losing Damon if we ever actually got together? No, is the answer to that last question.

"I don't have a thing for bad boys" I protest seriously, "I have a thing for my _**brother"**_

Kol winces in sympathy,

"Mate, you are so fucked"

In the head, yeah.

I'm gonna have to take up drinking. Or smoking. Or...something that'll stop me from thinking about being fucked by my brother.

Fucked in the head, hello, thy name is Stefan moron Salvatore.

...

_**Special shout out to-**__**Enchanted Hybrid**__**, **__**BroodyCheery323**__**, **__**Frozen862,**__** chhavi and Guests who have left reviews-Your reviews are amazing, and I love you for them so please do not stop my simply smashing readers ;) xxx**_

_**Ok, so, a lot of perspectives in this one, I really hope you enjoyed it. More to come soon ;)**_

_**Let me know what you think about Damon and Stefan's relationship-is it worth the risk?**_

_**Are there any other couples you've started to think could happen or that you would like to happen? xxx ;)**_

_**Thanks so much for reading! xxx**_


	5. Is he doing the frick frak?

_**I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx**_

_Damon and Stefan drama folks, get used to this, because it's only gonna get worse x_

Chapter five: _**'Is he doing the frick frak?'**_

**Damon's P.O.V**

Stefan strides into the kitchen and freezes at the sight of me. He came home late last night, and I wanted to ask him where the hell he'd been. But that would be caring, and I decided long ago that caring just really isn't my thing. I arch an unbothered eyebrow at him and smirk when he tries to retreat slowly, as if that's going to change the fact that I've already _**seen**_ him. Obviously some things are still the same then. Stefan is still an idiot sometimes.

"Stef, if you plan to run away every time you see me then, well, it's going to get a little awkward. You could at least fake some kind of emergency so that my feelings aren't hurt" I say casually, a smirk still well and truly planted on my face.

Stefan narrows his eyes at me, and he seems to make some kind of decision. He stops retreating, instead moving forward into the kitchen and replying in an oddly cold tone,

"Since when do you have feelings?"

I nod at him tightly,

"They're new"

Stefan rolls his eyes and opens the fridge, reaches inside for the milk, and turns place it on the counter in front of him. He appears to be ignoring me, and I decide quite selfishly that I hate that, so I say,

"Got school today Steffy?"

My brother shrugs noncommittaly and looks up briefly at me,

"Yeah"

Right, so he's decided to sulk. Oh joy unbounded.

"Where were you last night?" I ask him. Well, I have nothing to lose if he's going to be difficult anyway, so I might as well ask him a question that's been driving me silently insane all night and most of this morning.

Stefan turns on me, quite dramatically actually, and snaps back,

"Where were you for the last two years?"

"Why do you care?" I counter.

Stefan crosses his arms and stares me down idignantly,

"I just _do_ Damon. Why, am I not allowed to care about where you've been?" he asks incredulously

"No" I answer firmly.

Stefan makes a frustrated sound and runs a hand through his hair. Wow, he's gonna make it non-purposely messy, which means the brooding will kick up another few notches. Then again, there's so much gel in there that it might take a year long shower just to get it all out enough to fuck it up a little.

"Why?" Stefan demands, anger starting to spark in his eyes.

"Because it's none of your damn business" I answer bluntly.

For a moment Stefan looks shockingly hurt, and that makes me wince internally. I don't **like **upsetting my little brother, but fuck if I know how to stop. But then Stefan schools his features into something less intense and his expression turns to stone almost impressively fast. Seems Stefan is better at hiding his emotions than he was before I left.

Stefan's bright green eyes meet mine and he says,

"Then where I was last night is none your business either"

I move around the kitchen counter that was between us until I'm beside Stefan, only a few inches seperating me from him. Our gazes lock, and Stefan swallows audiably. Heat fills the space between us, stiffling all rationality from my mind, if there was any there in the first place. I reach across and push a stray lock of Stefan's hair out of his eyes. He doesn't pull away, but his whole body tenses dramatically, and I'm pretty sure I even heard a sigh escape his lips in reaction to my touch. But I really can't go there without thinking of other stuff.

Stuff I said to Katherine I wouldn't even consider thinking about. Well, a bit late for all that now universe. And fuck you too for this shit.

"It's different" I say simply.

Stefan frowns, but he doesn't pull away, even whe he asks in confusion,

"Why is it different?"

I shrug as if it's obvious,

"It's different because you're a **child**"

Stefan eyes fill with so much anger and pain that I'm not at all surprised when his power pushes at me intensely. Emotion fuels his power just as it fuels mine, which is pretty much the only thing we have in common.

"I am not a child! I'm eighteen years old Damon" Stefan practially shouts the words in my face, which I know I should find infuriating, but I actually just find amusing. With anyone else it would have pissed me off. But Stefan's **real** anger isn't something I get to see very often, and I savour it now.

Fury is something I understand all to well.

"You can't treat me like a kid anymore" Stefan snaps harshly at me.

I twist that same lock of Stefan's hair around my finger, and he **still** doesn't pull away even though he's angry at me. He better not do that with everyone. He better not be letting anyone touch him like this at all now that I think of it.

"Yeah, I can" I say.

"No, you can't" Stefan argues, "I'm an adult, you have to treat me like one"

I smile at him,

"Uh, no I don't"

Stefan looks about two seconds away from actually stamping his foot, but in true Stefan fashion, he reels his emotions back in and clamps down on them hard enough to leave a bruise on his soul if he's not careful. Stefan huffs, he actually freakin' _**huffs**_, and says all pretend calmly,

"Why must you always be so difficult?"

I sigh heavily and reply,

"Why must you always ask such stupid questions?"

"No, really, why?" Stefan says, his eyes bright still with the emotion he is trying to hide from me for whatever teenagery reason.

I shrug again and answer,

"Because I can, why else would I do anything?"

It's Stefan's turn to sigh, and he draws it out for a long time,

"I don't understand why you do what you do Damon. I never have"

"Then it's about time you stopped trying Steffy" I reply plainly.

"Screw you too Damon" Stefan says, another spark of anger entering his voice.

I pull lightly on the lock of Stefan's hair and he actually moves forward just like I wanted/didn't want him to. I have conflicting emotions, ok. And yes, I really hate that.

"So, I'll repeat, where were you last night?" I say coaxingly.

Stefan's brow furrows, but he answers,

"At a friend's house Damon. Happy?"

"What friend?" I demand unapologetically.

"Kol Mikaelson. He's still pretty new in town. I like him." Stefan answers, almost seeming to do so against his own will.

_**'I like him'**_

What the fuck does that mean?

"Have you fucked him?" I ask, the words slipping out before I can stop them.

Stefan blinks in surprise, but recovers fast enough to reply angrily,

"Have you fucked Ric?"

"Yes" I answer without hesitation.

Alaric and I have once or twice. Maybe three times? I'm not sure, most of our time together has been spent with us both drunk. It was nice. I miss those simple days. But Ric was still pretty hung up on his ex girlfriend, Isobel. I was hung up on my brother, which sounds so damn creepy, no wonder I needed to be drunk to even think about it.

Stefan seems thrown for another few moments, and then he glares at me,

"Are you...with him?" he asks tentatively as if he really doesn't want to know the answer.

"Who?" I ask right back.

Stefan's hands clench into fists,

"The Hunter, you dick" he says in exasperation.

"No" I answer truthfully. Ric is my friend, and, as I've learnt the hard way, you shouldn't fuck your friends. At least not the ones you want to **stay** your friend.

I narrow my eyes at Stefan,

"So, are you fucking this Kol kid or not?"

Stefan starts breathing more loudly, although I have no idea why, and answers coldly,

"You don't get to know"

"_**Stefan**_" I warn, a growl working it's way up my throat.

But Stefan has that stubborn look on his face, and he says,

"I get to say and do whatever the hell I want. I don't want to tell you if I'm having sex with Kol or not. So I won't"

"Answer the damn question Stefan" I really do growl this time, and damn, I can't help it. He's just being so fucking frustratingly..._**Stefan**_.

Besides if he is screwing..._Kol_...then that will have to stop.

There's no way in hell I'm living in this town with the knowledge that Stefan is being touched like that by someone else. I know that I'll lose my shit in an epic fashion all over the fucking place. I might just burn the whole of Mystic Falls to the ground by freakin' accident. Well, sort of by accident anyway.

"No" Stefan says firmly, a dare shining in his eyes.

What does he expect me to do? What does he want me to do?

Actually, I don't care.

I have Stefan up against a wall and trapped there by my body within seconds, and the surprised look on Stefan's face is very satisfying. It doesn't last long though because soon Stefan is struggling against my hold.

"Damon, what are you doing? Let me go"

"No" I state fiercely, "'I don't want to. So I won't'"

"_**Damon**_" Stefan sounds exasperated again, and a little nervous.

Good, he should feel that way.

"Just answer the question Stefan" is all I say in response.

Stefan's expression goes stubborn again and he shakes his head,

"No"

"Fine" I hiss through clenched teeth. My body is crushing Stefan's against the wall and I have no intention of moving no matter what Stefan might want right now.

"Stop being stupid Damon" Stefan tries to struggle free, but I have his hands pinned above his head quite easily.

"Answer the damn question Stef" I reply, and I lean in closer to ghost my lips over Stefan's strong jaw.

"No" Stefan's breathing stutters and the word 'no' comes out strained.

"Answer. The. Question." I punctuate each word with an almost gentle roll of my hips, causing Stefan to muffle a moan against my shoulder.

"What would you do if I said yes?" Stefan asks, his voice still strained and cracked.

I force myself to consider his question for a moment, even though white hot rage courses through me at even the thought of it. I want to break something really fucking bad right now. Finally I answer,

"I would kill him"

Stefan's breathe hitches,

"_**No. **_You **can't** do that Damon"

"Yes I could" I reply with a smirk.

Stefan meets my eyes for a few moments,

"Fine then. No."

"No _what?"_ I demand.

Stefan huffs again,

"No, I am not having sex with Kol yet"

See, now, all would have been fine if he hadn't added the 'yet' part.

"Stefan, stop pushing me" I growl, my temper amping back up again.

"I'm not pushing you" Stefan argues not very convincingly.

"You're still a rubbish liar Stef" I say in response, "Why are you pushing?"

"I'm _**not** _pushing!" Stefan shouts.

"Why are you **lying**?" I shout back.

"Why did you leave for two years without calling me even once to let me know that you were alright?" Stefan whispers.

The tension in my shoulders gets worse because of the fear in his voice,

"I'm alright. You can see that" I answer numbly.

"That's not the point and you _**know it!" **_Stefan sounds really upset now, and I don't know what the hell to do about it.

"It's complicated Stefan!" I say more emotionally than I meant to. Damn. Frickaty frak on a stick, this is not going well at all.

"Then explain it to me" Stefan's eyes are blazing now, and it hurts to look at them. They're so stunningly beautiful that it's incredibly painful, the purity of his soul burns me.

"I _**can't**_" I try to say.

"Why **not**?" Stefan demands, his voice and expression match in intensity now.

"Just...just...because" is all I can manage.

Stefan grits his teeth and snaps,

"Seriously, that's all you got? Two years of silence and the reason you give me is 'just because'. What is wrong with you?"

So many things, I answer silently.

Out loud though I say,

"I'm fucked up Stef, but we've always known that"

"I **hate** you" Stefan curses, but there's more resignation in his voice now than anger.

I cup his handsome face in one hand, my thumb stroking over his cheek lovingly. I lean forward and press our foreheads together, my answer comes out as a whisper,

"I know baby, I know"

...

_**Special shout out to-BroodyCheery323, Anastasia, HalfwayGone, Enchanted Hybrid and any Guests who took the time to review-I love you all my amazing peoples. These reviews are the best part of my week, so please do continue to tell me what you think, any comments are welcome ;) xxx**_

_**So, this chapter is a taste of the mind fuckary that is Stefan and Damon's messy feelingsy relationship. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it xxx**_

_**Thanks so much for reading! xxx**_


	6. Three woods and a dork

**_I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx_**

_Warning of some sexual content my peoples ;)_

Chapter six**:**_** 'Three woods and a dork'**_

**Stefan's P.O.V**

How did I end up in this situation?

Actually, strike that, I know how, and I know why. Because I wanted to piss off Damon, or at least prove that he doesn't have any power over me. That his presence doesn't control my actions. Even though by doing this for those reasons I'm contradicting myself even further.

But, hell, sometimes even I can be stupidly impulsive. Not often. But sometimes.

He presses me back up against a tree and I let him. Not that I'm completely unwilling, but, still, I should probably know better than this. I should, I'm supposed to be the good responsible one. Apparently, I'm a bit more like Damon than I ever thought possible. Definitely more than_** he**_ ever thought possible.

When I bite his lip and tug it between my teeth he groans and moulds his body even more against mine, our chests are mashed together almost painfully. His tongue slides into my mouth and I allow it. Because I'm an idiot. Because it feels good. Because Damon's got me all fucked up inside and I have to let out my frustration somehow.

Oh crap, he's only been back a few days and already I'm hearing his voice inside my head.

My heart pounds like crazy when I move on to biting Kol's neck. He arches against me and moans as I bite very close to his throat. I try to contain my blood lust, I mean, I find it harder than most vampires to control the need to suck people dry, but I'm not about to rip out my friend's throat just because he's got me all hot and hard in the fucking woods.

Now, I know what you're thinking. But...

All we were doing was talking. Kol wanted to hang out after school in the woods and I agreed to go with him, mostly because I really didn't want to go home just in case Damon was there being all sarcastic and unpredictable and unfairly gorgeous. He's always been far too attractive for his own good, even when we were kids. Damon got his way a lot by charming people, and sometimes it would frustrate me, for reasons I'm not sure how to describe.

I know my supposed 'innocence' used to annoy Damon. I don't know why. But then, understanding Damon is a life long endeavour. So are my…my what? My 'feelings' for Damon? Yeah, right, them.

What I feel for Damon is…..a bit like my blood lust. It'll always be there, no matter what I do. I'm just worried that, like my blood lust, I'll have a hard time stopping myself from giving in to Damon like I have so many times before. I know my emotions have the power to consume me, that_** Damon**_ has the power to consume my every thought and action. He's frustrating like that.

I definitely made the first move on Kol, but he doesn't seem to be protesting all that much. I know I'm not the most observant person in the world, but I did notice how Kol looked at me sometimes.I'm not the complete niave idiot Damon seems to think I am. Not anymore anyway. I could tell that Kol would at least be open to the idea of me and him..and stuff. I've just never….I never thought about being with anyone like this but Damon.

After having a thing for **the** Damon Salvatore…I mean, where do you go from there?

My brother has so many flaws, I know that, but….it's…he's just…..he's…_**Damon**_.

I've spent almost my whole life comparing every person I've ever been attracted to, to Damon. No one's measured up, which is ridiculously stupid. It's not like there isn't anyone out there who's as handsome or as funny or as clever or as charming or as sexy. But somehow Damon just takes all those things and makes them his own. There is no one in this world even remotely like my older brother.

It drives me insane. _**He**_ drives me insane. And yet, even after all the awful crazy stuff he's done, I still can't bring myself to truly hate him. Even though I told him I do. I hope he doesn't really think I hate him. I don't want to hurt Damon, he's had enough of that pain to last a lifetime already.

But that doesn't mean he has the right to order me around like I'm still his adoring little brother. Not anymore. If I want to screw Kol, then I damn well will. Hell, if I want to suck Kol off in the woods and go home smelling like sex, then I fucking _**can**_. He has no right to tell me I can't.

I don't even know why he _**cares.** _That's the most frustrating part.

Fine, he see's me as his stupid kid brother, I can just about handle that. But what does me being a _**'child'**_ have to do with who I'm with? Why does it matter to him?

See, he's just such a mind fuck of a person, he always has been.

When we were kids Damon would let me in a little bit and then shove me back out like I never meant anything to him. It hurt so much back then. And I still think about all that stuff, every night.

I used to feel like I'd failed him somehow by not being the type of brother he wanted.

I'm not quite self loathing enough to say that I feel like I failed him just because I exist, because that's melodramatic even for me. But, I do wish I knew what he wanted from me so I could just **give** it to him and then he'd be happy. I guess, if I'm being honest, all I've ever wanted is for Damon to be happy. And, in my more selfish moments I have wanted to be the cause of that happiness.

Kol's hands have moved under my t-shirt and I'll admit that it feels good to be touched with such heat and desire. I can see it in Kol's eyes; he wants me. I try to push thoughts of Damon away, so I can at least try to be normal for a while and enjoy this with Kol. I mean, why shouldn't I?

Kol is very attractive and fun to be around, and I do really like and care about him.

_**But he's not Damon**_

My fucked up mind whispers to me.

What the hell is wrong with me? Why can't I just be normal for once in my life?

Then Kol does something I really can't ignore, he goes to his knees. Oh crap.

Kol stares up at me for a moment, his eyes silently asking for permission. I give him an almost unintelligible nod, which causes Kol to grin up at me wickedly. That grin makes my stomach flip over. I'm not sure if the feeling is pleasant or not. It's defintely not a deal breaker though.

Especially when Kol undoes the button and zipper on my jeans, releasing my hard cock. The fresh autumn air rushes through me as I take a harsh deep breath inwards. I let my head fall back against the tree for a moment and then-

HOLY SHIT!

Warmth envelopes my cock, causing it to swell even more dramatically. I look down slowly to see Kol with his lips wrapped around my steely length. Kol's tongue plays with the thick head of my erection and I can't seem to stop myself from plunging my hands into his perfectly styled hair. It's already a little messy from our hot and heavy make out session against the tree. And in his car.

Fuck, this feels good. It seems Kol might have some prior experience with all this giving head business. A point he proves only a few minutes later by swallowing my cock to the back of his throat. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!

I had no idea that was actually possible, like, I'd heard about it, but I didn't think anyone could really do it without choking. It makes me wonder if I could do that. I mean, I know I could suck someone's dick, I'm not that mentally inaficient. But I can't help but wonder what it would be like to try and take someone all the way down. It must take some practice and skill.

Then my brain conjures up images of me sucking someone off. First it's Kol, and that's fine._ Fine_. But without my permission my fucked up mind exchanges Kol in my fantasy for Damon. A shiver courses through my body at even the thought of being that intimate with him. An undeniable heat lights me up from the inside out as I imagine Damon's hard length in my mouth and me taking all of him, completely. Even better, having Damon **make** me take it, because I can't imagine Damon ever being a passive participant in anything, including sex.

Maybe especially sex.

That image alone has me coming harder than I ever have before. It's crazy and wrong of me to be thinking about my brother whilst somone else sucks my cock. So. Very. Wrong. I feel guilt swarm up inside me and threaten to steal all the breathe from my body in one foul sweep.

I've always been a very guilt ridden person. When I was eight years old I accidentally broke one of the boarding house windows. My step father blamed it on Damon and even though Damon accepted the blame without a second thought, I still felt so guily. It made me sick to even think about what I'd done. In the end I couldn't take it anymore and I told my step father the truth. Damon got shouted at again for lying and letting his family down. I got praise for telling the truth.

Now that I think about it, now wonder Damon doesn't like me.

Kol must have swallowed my come, because when he rises from his knees and kisses me, I can taste it. I kiss him back, hard, trying desperately to shove the images of Damon away. Another wave of guilt assaults me. Kol pulls back and looks into my eyes, almost seeming to contemplate something. My discomfort at his scrutiny must register because Kol says surprisingly smoothly,

"What brought this on Stefan?"

I almost choke on my own tongue. My mind spins rapidly, what do I say? The truth? God, no, what if Kol hates me for it? I really do like Kol, I don't want him to hate me.

Kol leans in closer to me and kisses the corner of my mouth almost affectionately, a small smile forming on his face,

"Actually, don't answer that. I think we both know what your reason was for starting this, or I guess I should say 'who'. No worries Stefan, I'm not judging you, ok. Stop panicking"

I frown at him even though his words unfurl a ball of relief in my chest,

"I'm not panicking" I lie.

Kol laughs, he actually laughs right in my face,

"Stefan, we've been friends long enough that I know you're the type to panic and feel guilty about something like this. Especially considering your reasons"

My body relaxes a little against the tree and Kol moves with me, his body again brushing up against mine in all the right places. Suddenly a realisation hits me and my eyes lock with Kol's,

"Shit, Kol, let me-"

He grabs hold of my hands, stopping them from undoing his jeans and reciprocating. I frown at him and he presses against me completely. I feel a vague wetness at my groin, but not the straining hardness I expected. My brows furrow, but before I can say anything Kol laughs almost shyly and whispers,

"No need mate, I kinda, already...you know..."

My eyes widen at the realisation that Kol came just from sucking me off. Wow that's...pretty hot actually. Would I come like that if I sucked Damon off?

I'm almost certain I'd come if he even just **touched** me.

_**You'd come if he told you to, one look and that would be it,** _a darkly amused voice in my head whispers. I hate that voice. it sounds like Damon.

"Oh" I say in response to Kol's admission, "Look, Kol, I don't...I mean...I didn't plan on-"

"Mate, calm down. It was just a blow job, no big deal" Kol tries to reassure me, with a hand on my waist, squeezing slightly.

"Yeah, uh, right. I get it, no big deal" I nod, trying to sound like I do this sort of thing all the time and that it's not bothering me to think that I've just used Kol. It still feels wrong though, and I decide to be honest and say so.

"Listen Kol...I shouldn't have just kissed you like that. It wasn't fair of me to use you and-"

"Would you like to go out?" Kol cuts me off completely with a few words and one speculative look.

I stutter for a few moments before managing to say,

"Wha-what?"

Oh yeah, Stefan, very smooth, very attractive. Could I be any more of a dork right now?

"I said would you like to go out with me?" Kol says, a grin hiding somewhere behind that serious expression.

"Like on a date?" I ask, and then immedietly regret the question. Apparenly the answer is yes, I can be more of a dork.

"No, Stefan, like on a pixie hunt" Kol says sarcastically, "Yes like a date, you prat"

I bite my lip, having no idea of what to say. On the one hand I'm not completely turned off by the thought of going on a date with Kol, because, as I said, I do like him, and obviously the attraction is there. But...is it right to go out with Kol when I still have unresolved feelings for Damon.

Then again, Damon has no interest in me like that, and he is my BROTHER. I really need to get a fucking grip.

I find myself nodding at Kol and smiling despite myself,

"Uh, um, yeah, ok, that sounds...good, that sounds good"

Kol seems deeply amused by my reaction, and incredibly pleased by it, but all he says is,

"It will be, Stefan, I promise"

Now, all I need to do is get this stupid fucking guilty feeling I have swirling in my gut like I've just cheated on Damon to go away and everything will be fine. Really _**fine**_.

That freakin' dark voice whispers, _**d**__**ating Kol won't make your feelings for Damon go away**_

Oh shut _up_!

...

_**Special shout out to-Vash, BroodyCheery323 and Enchanted Hybrid-I love your reviews so much and it means a lot to me that you take the time to write them so please don't stop! xxx **_

_**Spoiler for next chapter-Snark and whole lot of jealous Damon! You know you love it ;) xxx**_


	7. Ignorance is Heaven, and Love is Hell'

_**I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx**_

Chapter seven: **_'Ignorance is heaven and love is hell. Choose wisely.'_**_**  
**_

**Damon's P.O.V**

"Pour me another one then if I'm gonna have to sit here with you in silence" Alaric says, his tone dry and mildly questioning. Damn, he's going to turn one of our drinking sessions into another heart to heart moment, I can feel it. I am NOT drunk enough for this. But then, I'm never drunk enough to actually deal with all the shit that's rolling around inside my head. And I never want to be. I like my shit where it is, so I can keep an eye on it.

I get us both a new drink and down mine before replying dryly,

"No one's forcing you to sit with me. In fact, I'd rather drink alone. I get more done that way."

"You're wallowing" Ric accuses with a small smile, "Admit it"

I lean back against the sofa and sigh in annoyance. This is the problem with having friends, they always want know shit about you. There is something to be said for being unsociable and unliked. I still don't know why Ric puts up with me, in fact, I'm not even sure why I put up with **him**. Other than the fact that he is, on all counts, a good drinking buddy.

Best one I've ever had. Except for when he wants to talk to me about….things. You know, like real life and feelings and….all the crap I drink to avoid thinking about in the first place.

I look at my friend with an arched eyebrow,

"Don't psychoanalyse me Dr. Van Helsing. I am perfectly content in my role as the high functioning sociopath. I'm not your patient"

Ric considers this for a few seconds and then says,

"No, but you are my friend. And I know you. You've been acting weird ever since we got to this damn town. Does the kid really have that much affect on you?"

I groan half heartedly and run a hand through my hair, tugging at the ends in frustration,

"Always has. Always will"

Ric raises an eyebrow in surprise,

"Then….."

I narrow my eyes at him, what, does he expect me to freakin' guess? What am I,_** His**_ therapist?

"We aren't doing the finishing each others sentences thing Ric. Our relationship hasn't gotten to that stage yet"

Ric laughs and pours himself another drink, which is probably for the best, the drunker Ric becomes, the less likely he'll be to ask questions about my life. Or so I'd like to think. What can I say, I'm a terminal optimist.

"Should I ask what's stopping you from taking the kid?" Ric asks me wisely.

"No"

"Should we have never come here?"

"Yes"

"Should I be worried about you?"

"No"

"Should I be worried about the kid?"

I pause at that. Ah, so now I'm a magic-8 ball. Great.

"Ask again later" I say with a tired smirk.

Ric just shakes his head in what I assume is exasperation. It usually is when aimed at me.

"I like the kid Damon, he seems….kind and….cute. But…..I never thought you'd be the type to get hung up on anyone so...pure hearted"

I roll my eyes at him,

"Yeah, that's me, always the unpredictable Italian stallion"

Ric barks out a laugh,

"You're impossible" he says.

I smirk more widely at him now,

"**I**, am amazing. It's not my fault if you peasant Hunters can't see how us Demons are obviously your superiors in every way"

Ric sighs heavily and gives me a sardonic look,

"You make it really hard to like you sometimes"

"Would it help if I said I think you're the exception?" I ask.

"Depends, is that true?" Ric questions suspiciously.

I think about that for a moment before responding,

"Define _'true'_"

"You're an asshole Damon Salvatore" Ric says, but there's a good amount of affection in his tone that contrasts with the meaning of his words.

Just as I am about to respond, I feel a very familiar stroke of heat go up my spine. Stefan. He's back. My whole body stiffens and Alaric notices with an almost amused expression on his face.

"I'm gonna go into town, you stay here and…try not to do anything stupid" Ric warns me warily.

I want to glare at him and snap that I won't. But there's a good chance that I will do something stupid, so his concern is well founded.

Alaric leaves just as Stefan comes in, they pass each other on the way and Stefan gives Ric an almost calculating look of distaste. I didn't know my brother was capable of disliking people, let alone treating them as such. Ric watches my brother with that same amused look on is face. If he keeps that up then there might be one less Hunter in the world by the end of the week.

Stefan's jaw tightens at the sight of me, and he looks about to retreat. I think about letting him just walk away, as that would be better for both us, but then I smell it. Fuck, I can practically feel it pouring off of him in thick waves. Arousal. Spent arousal. What the actual _**fuck**_?

Who would Stefan-

A fury so profound and violent takes hold of me with a blazing fire I haven't felt in years. I'm up on my feet, alcohol immedietly forgotten. Stefan must see something in my eyes because he takes a very deliberate step back. His own green eyes are wide and unsuspectingly innocent. That just pisses me off even more.

I advance on Stefan and he makes to bolt, I growl at him,

"If you run, I _**will**_ come after you little brother. I'll drag you back here kicking and fucking _screaming_ if I have to"

Stefan's breathing becomes harsh and his eyes blaze with anger. But he doesn't stop me from backing up against the wall. I'm so fucking furious right now that it takes concious effort on my part not to lose it completely and destroy everything in sight. Or kill something. More likely someone. A very specific someone. Whoever touched Stefan would do nicely.

I block Stefan in between my arms, my hands planted firmly against the wall on either side of his head. Stefan stares back at me, his gaze as unwavering as mine.

"_Stefan_-" I start, but he breaks in with,

"I'm not sorry" it comes out as quiet as a whisper, but there's a steely determination to his voice too.

My jaw tightens almost painfully and I narrow my eyes down at Stefan,

"You're not sorry about...**_what_**?"

If he's gonna play with the big boys then he better be able to say the fucking words.

Stefan's bites his lip, and yeah, that takes up a bit of my attention, although I'm certain he's not doing it to distract me on purpose. I hate that he affects me without even realising it, it's so typically Stefan to be oblivious like that. He shakes his head and says stubbornly,

"I can do what I want"

I tilt my head to the side, piercing him with my gaze, and ask calmly,

"What did you do?"

Stefan glares at me, and then winces at the anger he must see sparking in my eyes. The Demon within me is just aching to cause chaos, to destroy whatever it can. My own fire is trying to push to the surface so it can do some serious damage. I try to shove all that back. Now is not the time to lose it. I can do that bit later.

My brother swallows hard and mutters,

"It doesn't matter"

"Oh, it **matters" **I snap harshly.

Stefan's hands clench into fists,

"_**Why?**_" he snaps back, but there's a pleading note to his voice. He really wants to know.

"Why would you do this to me?" the question comes out of my mouth before I can stop it, and for a moment we both freeze in place.

Stefan's expression is one of hurt and almost explosive anger,

"It was good. It felt good. He likes me. I like him. It's simple and easy and..._safe_" he chokes on the last word and my heart clenches painfully inside my chest. God, I fucking hate this. But there's something in me that just won't let go. Not now, not with Stefan standing here staring up at me like what he did was all my fault.

"I'm not safe" I all but whisper.

Stefan chokes out a strained laugh, minus the humour. He meets my gaze head on as he says,

"No. You're not safe. You're not good for me"

"I'm not good for anyone, or myself" I admit without reflection, I give Stefan a tight smile, all that rage and desire and jealousy swirling together in a great fucking mess inside my head. I'm surprised my brain hasn't exploded by now.

Stefan makes a strange sound at the back of his throat, an almost whimpering groan, his eyes are still locked with mine as he forces out the words,

"I've _**missed**_ you Day"

My heart pounds harder and faster with that one admission from Stefan. My little Angel Steffy. **Fuck**, I've missed him too, so **_much_**. _Too_ much. More than I ever could have imagined. Enough to make me regret leaving him every damn day for the past two years.

"_Stefan_" I breathe, agony lighting up my soul and burning it black.

Stefan moves fast, nothing careful or tentative about his intent, he presses his face into my neck and breathes me in. His lips and nose are pressed against my throat. I shudder at the intimate contact, and my hand goes to the back of his neck, holding him firmly in place.

"I don't hate you Day, you know that right, you have to know that" Stefan whispers brokenly into my shoulder-blade.

I grit my teeth with the effort not to lose control of the fire just beneath the surface. I hold him tighter, my own voice low and pained as I whisper back,

"Oh _baby_, I know, I know you don't hate me. You should though, you have every right to. I was never much of a brother-"

"That's not true" Stefan argues heatedly, he pulls away slightly so that he can look at me properly. His bright green iris' practically glow with emotion, and I know I won't be able to hold his gaze for very long without breaking. And I can't afford to break, not in front of him.

"You were there for me Damon, when I** really** needed you, you were there, and that's what matters" Stefan says with complete certainty.

I run my fingers through Stefan's hair, my hand caressing him automatically. There's just something about Stefan that's always called out to me. I could feel it from the moment I met him. Even when Stefan was too young for me to even consider wanting him in that way, I knew it felt right and mind blowingly amazing to simply touch him.

I've missed touching Stefan so much that it used to physically hurt to be away from him. I ached to be close to Stefan. I used to watch him all the time when we were younger. I liked seeing him and being close to him, even if he didn't know or understand why. Stefan has always been everything to me, even when I didn't realise how deeply I actually felt.

Now I do know; and I wish desperately that I could go back to that simple ignorance.

But there's no going back from this. Sometimes I think there never was; that from the moment I laid eyes on Stefan, it was inevitable that we would end up here.

I'm losing my fucking mind. I sound like a love-sick_** idiot.**_

_What is wrong with me?_

**_So. Many. Things._**

Thank you universe! Screw you too!

"Stef...you were right. I'm **_so bad_** for you baby" I say with feeling, but when Stefan wraps his arms around me, I do the same, enveloping him into a possessively meaningful embrace.

"I don't care" I hear Stefan mumble contentedly, his voice strong and heated.

I want to let go and just be with Stefan, but that nigling feeling of jealousy won't go away.

"Why did you let him have you Stefan?"

"I'm not perfect Damon" Stefan says stiffly, enough anger returning to his tone that I grip him harder. He settles back against me with surprising submissiveness.

_'Im not perfect'_

See now, that's the crux of the matter, because to me, Stefan is everything that is perfect and good and light. I want him to stay that way. If I was truly selfish enough to take him, to have him for myself, then I would ruin him. That's what I do. I destroy all the light and goodness in the world without even trying. Yeah, I'm just that fucked.

I think maybe I should charge the universe for my services, I mean, someone's gotta be the bad guy. And in this world, that bad guy is me.

I pull away from Stefan so I can cup his devistatingly handsome face in my hands, our eyes lock and I say fiercely,

"I'm a selfish person, I always have been. But, I can't be selfish with you Stefan. I won't be."

Stefan tries to look away, but I won't let him. He chokes back what sounds like a pained sob and he hardens his jaw, determination in his eyes as he demands,

"What if I said I want you to be selfish?"

I smooth a thumb over his cheek bone gently and reply with a heavy sigh,

"That's not how it works baby"

"Do you just...not want me?" Stefan asks, and there's something uniquely vunerable in his expression that makes me pause to analyse it more closely.

I bring my forehead to his, holding him there for a few moments as I try to regain control,

"It's not that I don't want you Stefan. It's that I want you too much"

"That doesn't make any sense" Stefan mutters darkly.

I look deeply into his eyes and say with a smile I know doesn't reach my own eyes,

"I hope you never have to find out how much sense it really does make Stef" I whisper. Then my voice voice becomes rougher and I say, pushing away the far too painful agony of wanting Stefan, and welcoming the rage back in like an old friend, "Right, so where is this Kol fucker so I can kill him?"

...

_**Special shout out to BroodyCheery323 and all Guests who took the time to review-I love you people to pieces as getting reviews inspires me more than anything else, so, please continue to let me know what you think of my story! xxx**_

_**Thanks so much for reading and please do let me know what you think! xxx**_


	8. Living for love, and running from it'

_**I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx**_

_**SEXUAL CONTENT WARNING!-So back away thy who no likie likie such filth and dirty times ;)**_

Chapter eight: _**'Living for love, and running from it'**_

**Stefan's P.O.V**

_(Flashback-Two years ago)_

_I pace outside his door for what feels like hours, hell, maybe it has been hours. I know he's upset about what his father said tonight, although he'd never admit that out loud. Not even to me. Well, maybe to me, if he feels like it. I want him to talk to me. Damon needs me, I know he does. Then why do I feel so damn nervous about talking to him._

_Actually, the answer to that one is easy; I'm afraid he'll turn me away. It breaks my heart in to tiny pieces every single time he shuts me out, and there are only so many times a person can fuse their heart back together, waiting for the next blow._

_"Stef, for fucks sake, you'll create a hole in the floor if you keep pacing like that, just come in" I hear Damon's low growl from the other side of the door, and I immediately comply with his demand._

_Damon practically yanks me inside as soon as I get the door open, and he flicks the lock whilst leaning very close into my personal space. I like having Damon in my personal space. He smells of leather and bourbon and fire and...just...**Damon.**_ _I try not to make it too obvious that I'm breathing him in, but I don't think I'm all that successful as Damon's tired expression turns into a smirk almost instantly as he stares down at me._

_"Come on then little brother, out with it, what's wrong?" Damon's breathe is hot on my face and my eyelashes flutter, a shiver runs down my spine in response to the intimate tone of his voice._

_I don't let that distract me though and I push on his chest so he'll back up some, fixing him with a hard look as I say,_

_"He had no right to say that Day; he was just angry"_

_Damon's jaw tightens, but apart from that he shows no other emotional change. He seems as dryly amused by everything as he always does. Damon rests his arms on my shoulder, his thumbs gently rubbing the back of my neck in a way he knows makes me relax into his touch. No one else has ever known that about me, and I don't want anyone else to know about it either. _

_That's just for Damon. _

_He's my big brother, and everything I am is his, whether he realises it or not. I could never give myself to anyone like this but Damon. He's...he means **everything** to me. Damon's my whole world, and no one could compare to him. He once told me that if he had to choose one person in the world to spend the rest of his life with, then he's choose me, no contest. That was years ago, when we were still kids, but I never forgot it, because around that time I realised I was in love with my brother._

_It's a big thing to realise, and it wasn't nearly as dramatic as one might imagine. There were no fireworks or choirs singing on my ears, no doves flying high or love ballads waiting in the wings. There was just me, and the sudden shock wave of pure **want** and **longing** and** all consuming** **love** for one person. And that one person was Damon. My brother, my hero, my best friend. He looked at me with those pale blue fire eyes, and in that moment, I just **knew**._

_To be honest, it's scary as hell to be in love with someone, and if you've never experienced it then you cannot fully comprehend just how frightening an experience it is to look at someone, and know you'll never love anyone else as strongly or as much as you love that one person. Let alone the thought that maybe they just don't love you back._

_But Damon loves me, I **know** he does._

_Damon looks into my eyes and replies drolly,_

_"No, he was right. I'm fucked up so bad that I can't see straight even when I'm sober. Especially then actually, because sober means rationality and logic. You know I don't do well with those"_

_I shake my head vehemently,_

_"There's nothing wrong with you Day. Nothing."_

_A flash of torn out vulnerability singes my soul and makes my heart clench painfully in my chest. The look in Damon's eyes undoes me in a way nothing else ever could. A sharp chuckle bursts out of Damon, and he takes my hand, pulling me towards his bed. I let him lead me because, yeah, I'd do just about anything Damon wanted me to right now._

_Damon sits on the edge of his bed and draws me down, moving me in such a way that it becomes obvious what he wants. I straddle Damon's lap unapologetically, and in return Damon's gaze stays locked with mine. The fierce desire in his eyes stirs something deep in my gut, and excitement mixed with a heady dose of fear dances through my insides._

_Damon's strong hands slide down over my hips to grip my ass possessively, his fingers digging into my skin with delicious intensity. I've wanted Damon to touch me like this for so long, and I was beginning to wonder if he ever would. It seems something has broken in him tonight, and he needs me desperately, more than he ever has before._

_"Run my little Angel Steffy, run" Damon whispers, his voice deep and throaty with lust._

_I wraps my arms around his neck,_

_"**No**" I say, and the word is barely past my lips before Damon's come crashing down on mine._

_His mouth is hot and full and so God damn perfect that I almost come in my jeans from that one kiss alone. I try to restrain myself at least a bit, there's no need to embarrass myself completely. But then Damon's heart searing kiss becomes even more insistent and I melt against him completely. When his tongue swipes over my lips, I open for him instantly, and his tongue sweeps inside, taking my mouth, claiming it his viciously and greedily._

_A sudden realisation hits me then; he's been wanting this for a long time. A very long time if the pent up desire in his every movement is anything to go by._

_Who knew Damon Salvatore had that much self restraint? Certainly not me._

_"Stef" he whispers my name like a curse and goes on to tear my white shirt from my body in one quick fire movement. I gasp as his lips travel down over my throat, only stopping to suck and nip at my pulse, and then continue over my collar bone and chest. I thrust my hands into his wild dark hair when he takes one of my now very firm nipples into his mouth. I'm breathing hard as Damon sucks my nipple between his teeth and not so playfully bites it enough to cause sweet ripples of pleasure to shoot through to my gut._

_Damon laughs darkly against my skin when he finally releases my nipple after lavishing it with attention for a few more agonisingly intense seconds. He looks up into my flushed face and my fingers twist in his hair, pulling on the ends rakishly. His eyes are practically glowing like true blue fire, and another gasp escapes me when he whispers,_

_"Like that baby? Tell me what you want Stef"_

_I'm still breathing hard as I whisper back breathlessly,_

_"You, God Day, I want** you**"_

_Damon tilts his head to the side, considering me for a moment,_

_"You sure baby? Cause once you admit you want it all...there's no holding back" his voice holds a promise with that, and I shiver in response to the dark desire in his eyes._

_The point of no return. We've finally reached it, just as I always hoped we would._

_"I've never wanted anything more Day...please"_

_Just like that Damon growls, low and primal in the back of his throat, and he flips us so my legs are still wrapped around his waist, but now he's looming over me. His broad muscled frame almost daunting, and at the same time, achingly familiar. Not to mention arousing as all hell. _

_Damon brings his face down close to mine and his lips brush my jaw teasingly as he rolls his hips into mine, causing our erections to rub together through our jeans. I just about hold in a shout at the contact. I've never felt anything quite like it in entire life. And something tells me it'll never feel this intensely pleasurable with anyone else. I don't want it to. I want **this**. I've only ever wanted this; me, Damon, sharing everything two people can share together._

_"Tell me what you want Stef" Damon's growl is soft and encouraging, but the rough way he keeps on rolling his hips, and therefore our cocks together, tells me just how badly he wants this too._

_I use my hands to cup Damon's face, looking him directly in the eyes as I say with a renewed confidence,_

_"I want you inside me Damon. I want you to be the first one who's ever had me like that"_

_And the last. But I don't add that part, as I think it really would be pushing too far._

_The change is instant. Damon gets his clothes off and the rest of mine within seconds, kissing, biting and marking patches of my skin wherever he can, almost as if he wants to claim every part of me at once. Eventually though we're both gloriously naked and I take a few moments to appreciate the hard planes and sculptured muscles of Damon's body. I want to lick him all over, learn ever dent, scar and tender spot. I want to know him like no one else in the world does, or will._

_I want to claim him just as much as he wants to claim me, even more so in fact._

_Damon moves us farther up the bed so we'll have more space, but then he's on my, nudging my legs apart and pressing the tip on one finger against the sensitive flesh of my hole. He watches my face intently as that tip of his finger penetrates me more fully. It burns, but the heat in Damon's eyes scolds me more harshly than anything physical could._

_"Stay still baby, I won't hurt you, I promise" Damon murmurs, his gaze fixed on mine with fierce intensity._

_I nod down at him, putting all my trust in Damon. I know he'll make it good, better than good. Every touch from Damon feels like a thousand tiny shocks of lightning slamming through me at break neck speed. I crave his caress and my desire for his penetrating erection makes my stomach feel like loads of massive freakin' bats are clamoring for a way to escape._

_I breathe through it as Damon manages to get the entirety of his fingers inside of me. It still burns, and I struggle not to show it when Damon moves up my body and captures my mouth in the sweetest kiss imaginable. He works a seconds finger into my burning passage, but I barely notice because Damon is so distracting with his long lingering kisses that set my on fire from the inside out._

_It should be illegal for someone to kiss like that. He takes my breathe away without even seeming to try, and it makes the excitement inside me kick up a few hundred notches. I'm panting and whimpering for more when Damon pulls back, three of his fingers now embedded in my scorching hot hole, his other hand running fingers through my sweat soaked hair in an almost gentle caress. He rests his forehead against mine and breathes deeply before whispering,_

_"I'm gonna make it so good for you baby, you'll love having my cock buried deep in your tight virgin hole, I know it" his words, although vulgar, are said with a certain loving edge, like he really wants me to feel special and cared for._

_I press another kiss to Damon's hot mouth before replying breathlessly,_

_"I want it, so bad...I want...to feel you. __Day...please...fuck me"_

_That does it._

_Damon slides his fingers out of me and only moments later I feel something much, much thicker breach my hole. The head of Damon's cock pushes into me and I gasp harshly at the fullness of it. He's so damn big and hard, I didn't realise it would feel quite so...invasive. But I still want it. I want to feel Damon move inside of me, I want it more than I want my next breathe. More than anything else in the universe._

_Damon works his way inside me slowly, trying not to damage my hole in any way as the sheer girth of him just might, even by accident. I'm breathing hard and fast for what feels like forever until eventually Damon is buried all the way to the hilt. _

_**Fuuuuccccckkk**, I feel so fucking full right now that I think I'll burst at the seams if Damon moves even an inch one way or the other._

_But then Damon's coaking me to open my eyes,_

_"Look at me baby, just open your beautiful eyes. I want to see them as I fuck you baby"_

_I force my eyes to stay open, and when they lock with Damon's, another ferocious storm of fire surges through me with an intensity I have no idea if I'll survive. He starts to move inside me then, his thrusts torturingly slow at first, but when I beg for him to go faster, Damon complies with that trademark secret smirk of his forming against my jaw._

_"Oh fuck" Damon growls, "Oh, yes, **baby**" he fucks me harder and faster and my hole starts to burn in protest at the rough treatment. _

_Damon's massive cock impaling me again and again and again at a steady, and fucking perfect, rhythm. The pain feels so damn good through mixed with the pleasure, and when Damon hits a certain spot inside me, I see stars and my vision goes white for a view seconds. I've never felt such mind blowing pleasure, it goes beyond the realms of sanity. I could get addicted to that feeling. Damon growls possessively and kisses me accordingly, his tongue claiming my mouth like it's his soul purpose for existence as he hits that sweet spot over and over again every couple of thrusts._

_I come twice more, the ribbons of come covering us both, and I'm so out of my mind with pleasure and desire and fucking **want **that I can barely think at all when Damon finally comes inside my ass, filling me up with his hot come, claiming me in a way that's final. For a few moments there our souls collided and twisted together, forming a bridge between us and letting our emotions pass between us. I could feel his pleasure as well as mine, and all the love that went into his every touch._

_Damon collapses against me breathing hard, his expression one of a man who is completely spaced out. I can't blame him as I feel exactly the same way. Eventually though Damon moves us so I'm back on top, although he manages to flip us so his cock stays firmly buried in my well abused hole. I don't mind, I like the feeling of being completely connected to Damon._

_I smile as Damon kisses me lovingly on the lips and runs his fingers through my hair. His eyes are still glazed, so his mind is in a far away place. But that's ok, I feel exhausted. I lay my head down and allow Damon to hold me tightly against him, my face buried against his neck. For once my craving for blood feels secondary to my need for Damon's embrace, and I allow myself to fall into a deep sleep as Damon strokes the back of my neck._

_(End of flashback)_

I remember waking up in my own bed; Damon must have moved me in the night, and cleaned me at some point as well as there was no evidence of what we'd done on my body accept the ache in my ass and the love bites all over my body.

I remember trying to find Damon, only to find that he'd already left the house that morning.

I remember going to school and the whole day passing as a blur because I was so damn excited to get home and see Damon again. I'd thought that night changed things between us, that we'd finally move forward with the relationship I'd thought we'd both desperately wanted.

I remember getting home to find Damon gone. Most of his stuff gone from his room. He was just...gone. Not even a note. Gone. He was gone. A sense of loss filled me up and drained me of everything that felt even remotely good. I was an empty shell who felt nothing.

My heart wasn't just broken that day, it was ripped out and burnt at the stake. Damon was gone, and my heart had fucked off with him.

...

_**Special shout out to-Austenite29, BroodyCheery323 and Guest who took the time to write an amazing review-You people are my life savers, I love your reviews and it means so much to me that you write them. I really like to know what you lot think of my story! xxx**_

_**So, this one was less about story development, and more about giving you a glimpse into the past, as I know some of you were interested in what the hell actually happened between Damon and Stefan. Well, now you know, and I'd really love to read about what you thought. Don't judge poor Day too harshly, there are two sides to every story...xxx**_

_**Thanks so much for reading! xxx**_


	9. In The Fraking Face

_**I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx**_

Chapter nine: 'In. The. Fraking. Face.'

**Stefan's P.O.V**

"No, Damon, please, stop!" I shout after my brother.

I shouldn't have told him where Kol lives, I know that, but I only did it so he'd calm down. But it seems to have had the opposite effect. I don't really know exactly what Damon plans to do. But he's got his murder eyes going on right now and that scares me.

He might actually kill Kol in this mood. Damon's rages have always been impressively destructive if nothing else.

I chase after my brother, but damn, Damon's fast, and I find it hard to keep up with him.

When we get to the Mikaelson home, I try to once more to stop Damon from tearing my friend apart. I grab his arm and tug him round to face me, he resists at first, of course he does, it's Damon, he's always gotta fight back. It's just the way he is.

But I don't let go, and eventually Damon relents and looks me in the eye. Damon's blue eyes blaze with a strange kind of heat that goes way beyond pissed off or even rage. I don't know why me being with Kol is such a problem for Damon, but I really want to understand.

"Damon, just...think for a minute" I begin warily, knowing he could snap at any moment, "Kol didn't force me, I did what I did of my own free will" Damon flinches slightly at that, but he hides his emotions too quickly for me to have been able to read them.

Damon wrenches his arm away from me and all but growls,

"I. Don't. Care."

That's all he says before he turns around and strides towards the Mikaelson's rather imposing front door.

I'm hoping maybe Kol is out, and one of his brother's answers when Damon knocks, more like bangs the living hell out of, the door.

But, apparently, luck is not on my side today.

It's Kol who opens the door, and it's Kol who yelps in surprise when Damon's fist makes contact with his face.

Damn it, no!

I rush forward without thinking to carefully about it, anger and worry and guilt shuddering through me in desperately strong waves.

Kol is now on the floor and moaning, his hand clutching at his nose, which appears to be bleeding. Damon must have put his true Demon force behind the hit if it's making Kol hurt that much.

Even though Kol is groaning and spitting out curses in many different languages, not all of them human, and I'm at his side, trying to help stem the flow of blood from his nose and reassure him, Damon seems perfectly content. He's leaning against the door frame rather casually, with a calm contemplating smirk on his face as he watches me and Kol.

He seems...I guess self-satisfied is the right word.

Damon is such a dick sometimes.

But, shit, that natural confidence is something I've always admired in him, and admittedly, been incredibly attracted to.

"What the bloody hell was that for?" Kol demands angrily, now having apparently gotten over his shock.

Oh, no, why did he have to ask that?

Now Damon might actually answer.

Do I want him to answer?

Considering the fact that **I** don't even know why Damon did this, then yes, I would.

Sort of. What if his answer isn't what I want it to be?

Then I'll die inside just a little more. I should be used to that by now when it comes to Damon.

Damon, though, merely shrugs as if answering Kol's question is secondary to everything else. He might say nothing, that would be very Damon, to keep us all guessing with his selfish and impulsive behaviour.

He doesn't care what Kol thinks of him.

But then, Damon's never really cared what **_anyone_** thinks of him. And why should he? None of it really matters.

I thought for a time that Damon cared what I think of him. Maybe I was wrong about that too.

Kol turns away from what I know is quite an intimidating stare from Damon if you're not used to it, and he looks directly at me. I'm still trying to stop him from bleeding out all over the floor. Kol's dark eyes meet mine and he asks slowly,

"Stefan...what's going on? Why did your brother just fucking hit me in the fucking face?"

I open my mouth, hoping words will suddenly come to me. They do not.

I end up kneeling there like an idiot with my mouth wide open and Kol staring at me waiting for an answer that may never come. Especially not with Damon standing right **there**. I can feel his pale blue gaze on me like blue fire singeing into my skin, marking me.

I'm saved from having to say anything though when Aaron, the eldest Mikaelson brother, and possibly the most gorgeous man and the most threatening man alive, comes striding up to us.

He takes one look at me and Kol on the floor and rolls his strangely compelling eyes. His gaze stutters however when it fastens on my brother. Recognition alights in his eyes and he curses once before saying in open wonder,

"Damon fucking Salvatore...do you want a drink?"

...

"So, what, he just punched Kol in the face? Like, really?" Caroline sputters in complete disbelief.

I exchange a sympathetic look with Elena. I shouldn't have told them all about what happened, because now they'll want to know why, and I honestly don't have an answer for them.

Or at least not one I'm willing to share right now.

I shrug and lift a drink to my lips, taking a sip before saying,

"Yeah, he did"

"Is Kol alright?" Elena asks worriedly, and I smile at her.

I do love Elena, she's always worrying about other people, putting them first, it's one of the reasons I consider her one of my best friends. We met at the age of five when we started school. Elena and me teamed up to stop another little boy from being bullied by Tyler Lockwood. He'd been a bit of an ass even then.

Not that I hate Tyler, he's still a friend, I just wouldn't trust him as much as I would Matt for example.

I nod in answer,

"Kol is fine, he's just a little shaken. He really wasn't expecting it"

Of course he wasn't, who expects a punch in the face when they open the door?

Kol is in the bathroom right now, getting another tissue. Even an hour later his damn nose is still bleeding, Damon really got him good.

I'd almost be impressed if he hadn't been hitting my friend.

"Of course he is, your...animal of a brother hit him for no good reason!" Caroline exclaims dramatically, her hands and arms going all over the place.

Matt makes a face and says,

"He must have had a reason, you don't just go to someone's house and hit a stranger in the face without a reason"

Thanks you Matt for bringing the conversation back to where I didn't want it.

"Unless you're insane" Bonnie points out, "And I'm guessing Damon isn't"

Jury's out on that one...

No, Damon is not certifiable.

But he is a dick, a violent dick.

A dick who apparently knows Aaron Mikaelson in a very intimate way. Their reactions to each other spoke louder than any words.

They seemed surprised to see each other, but their shock quickly turned into open familiarity. Damon must have met Aaron whilst he was gone. I'm very interested in that particular story. Although I'm fairly sure Damon won't tell me even if I do ask.

"No, can we just leave it guys...I really don't want to talk about my brother" I say, letting the tiredness I feel leak into my voice to distract them and hopefully agree to let it go.

Only for now in Caroline's case, that woman is like a terrier with a bone when she starts on something, or someone.

Bonnie leans forward expectantly and says with a small smirk,

"What about your date with Kol? Can we talk about that?"

I blink in surprise, having almost completely forgotten that I agreed to a date with Kol when we were in the woods.

I nod mutely,

"Uh, yeah, I guess..."

Caroline frowns,

"You don't sound that excited about it...I thought you liked Kol"

I cough loudly and clear my throat before answering,

"I do like Kol. A lot. It's just..."

It's just that I'm in love with my brother and I'm not sure if Kol will ever take Damon's place in my heart or under my damn skin.

"You don't have to go out with him if you don't want to Stefan" Elena says, reaching across the table and squeezing my hand.

I nod at her in thanks, but say,

"No, I do want to. Everything is a bit complicated at the moment though"

It's not a lie, things are complicated, and I do want to go out with Kol.

"I think you should. Kol is fun and he makes you laugh, I think you could be good together" Caroline says earnestly.

I can already tell she's planning our wedding inside her head. My cousin really is something else. But I love her.

Luckily or I'd have strangled her by now.

**Damon's P.O.V**

"I still can't believe it's you" Aaron exclaims in truthful disbelief, "Don't tell me you're the same Damon Salvatore all the townsfolk seem to enjoy gossiping about"

After dishing out a deserving blow to the little shit named Kol, I left Stefan to it and came inside to have a drink with Aaron. That one drink turned into many; as it always did.

I place a hand over my heart, assuming I have one after all, and smirk at my old friend,

"They still talk about me...wow...now I feel special"

Aaron winks at me and replies smoothly,

"Well you know what they say about absence making the heart grow fonder..."

I arch an eyebrow, if he's about to lie about how this town views my existence, then I'm gonna need another drink. I'm fully aware of what most people in this backwoods town think of me. I have no illusions. I don't want them to like me, that would mean I was in any way similar to them. That's the reason I took immense pride in the fact that my father didn't like me.

Aaron continues drolly,

"That is not true in this case. They all hate you"

"As they should" I say, taking another drink from my glass, "The feeling isn't mutual"

Aaron frowns, his handsome face scrunching into something akin to confusion,

"You don't?"

I shake my head,

"No. Hating means caring about them one way or the other. I do not."

Aaron nods in acceptance of that and asks,

"So, Stefan is your brother?"

I stiffen on instinct and shut down all emotions that might betray me.

Aaron may be a friend, but he is also a Demon, a pureblood very high ranking Demon at that. He would still use my weaknesses against me if he felt the need, or if he simply wanted to mess with me. Aaron has never struck me as the spiteful type, but you can never truly know a person until you've pushed them too far.

I don't trust him the way I do Alaric. The man's a hunter, an honourable hunter, it's in his nature to be loyal. Another reason I put up with him behaving like such an idiotic _**human**_, and probing into my life. Damn him, he's so annoying. I might have to kill him one day if he gets to know me any better, he's the only one who's gotten so close to truly knowing me.

Apart from maybe Stefan. But that was more proximity and dysfunctional affection than real trust.

I shrug casually and answer with a blunt undertone to my voice,

"Step brother. My father married his fanged girlfriend and Stefan was part of the deal"

Aaron laughs darkly and says,

"You never told me you had a brother"

I consider him for a moment and answer,

"I don't. I have a Stefan. Trust me, you've got the better deal with your ten thousand siblings"

Aaron rolls his dark eyes at me,

"Which brings me back to my original point...why is it, exactly, that you chose to punch my brother. I understand why someone would want to, of course, but why you specifically?"

I take another drink as to give myself time to come up with an answer that will both satisfy Aaron and not reveal my true reasoning. Finally I say,

"It was a warning"

Aaron quirks an interested eyebrow and leans towards me,

"Warning him...of what? Or off someone? I can tell you Kol is quite infatuated with your Stefan...or maybe that was who you were warning him off from"

I don't reply, anything I say would be misconstrued as giving a shit about what he thinks. He shouldn't guess of my... unhealthy feelings towards Stefan. I mean, who would? Stefan and I are nothing alike, and we spend most of our lives arguing with each other when we're together. There is nothing romantic about my relationship with Stefan.

Sexual on the other hand...

No, I refuse to think of that night. I am not weak like Stefan, I can conceal my emotions well enough, even from myself.

Caring for Stefan...maybe even loving the Angelic bastard...that doesn't matter.

I have limited self control, I know that. And I am selfish. But Stefan means more to me than anyone or anything in this world.

If I can't be selfless for him, then who can I be selfless for?

I won't stop him continuing on this road with Kol if that is what Stefan truly wants, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. And if that little shithead hurts Stefan...then he's gonna wish his family had stayed in hell.

...

_**Hey my peoples, I'm so sorry this took AGES to get posted. I really didn't mean it to. It's just that exams have had me swamped and I've still had to work four days a week as well. AHHHH! I'm ready to sleep for a month. But I hope you enjoy this chapter! xxx**_

_**Special shout out to-BroodyCheery323, Austenite29 and PLK Susie-Love your reviews, they keep me writing and I really appreciate you doing them. PLEASE keep letting me know what you think!**_

_**Spoiler for next chapter-Kol and Stefan's 'date'...how do you think Damon will actually react to his Stefan seemingly falling for someone else? xxx**_


	10. IMS is PMS for men

_**I do not own the vampire diaries or any of the characters in this fanfic except the ones I have created myself xxx**_

Chapter ten: 'IMS is PMS for men'

**Katherine's P.O.V**

"Hello stranger" I say as I slide onto the stool next to Damon. I made a beeline for the damaged moron as soon as I saw him sitting at the bar.

He looks at me in mild irritation and mutters cuttingly,

"We've known each other for years Kitty Kat, if you don't remember that then you're even drunker than I am right now. I really hope that isn't your best pick up line by the way...because it sucks. _**Hard**_" he smirks and tilts his head as if remembering something, "Just like you"

I roll my eyes at him and ignore his insults, as I often do.

"What are you IMS-ing about?" I ask in a bored tone of voice, even though I'd quite like to know. If only so I can either help him resolve the problem, or use it against him later.

Whichever comes first.

Damon frowns at me,

"First of all-IMS? What the hell is that?"

I shrug,

"Irritable male syndrome; it's like PMS, but for men"

Damon's expression becomes mockingly vacant and I narrow my eyes at him. He murmurs to himself,

"PMS for men...there's no such thing. I tell you what our PMS is, our PMS is woman like you running around saying things like 'IMS is PMS for men'. Fuck you and your entire species"

I tut at him,

"Species? Do you mean Hunters or women?"

He spares me a brief glance,

"You know, a man wouldn't have to ask that question. He'd already know the answer is, as always, _both_"

I scoff loudly and make a dismissive gesture,

"You men...all of you...big babies, you lot can't handle anything...that's why men die young you know, no endurance level"

Damon takes a large swig of whiskey from his glass and says to me,

"That's not why, it's because they **_want_** to"

I give him a slow hand clap,

"Ha, ha, very funny...ok, seriously, what's wrong with you now? Have you fucked the little Angel tween yet?"

Damon blows out an amused breathe,

"Fucking hell Kitty Kat, he's not that young, what kind of person do you think I am?"

I pretend to think about it, and trail a finger up his arm seductively. I answer bluntly,

"A bad one. A selfish one. A mean one. A angry one. A sexy one. A...drunk one"

Damon orders another drink and takes it like a shot down his throat. The burn obvious in his eyes. But then, Damon has always liked things that burn, our town almost went down in flames more than once because of it.

He says contentedly to me,

"I am not drunk...I am 'heavily intoxicated'"

I shove him in annoyance and reply sarcastically,

"Yeah, and I'm not slutty, I'm 'overtly promiscuous'"

Damon looks me up and down, and then removes my hand from his arm, he says passively,

"No. You're definitely just slutty Kat"

I sigh heavily,

"Are you going to tell me what's got your big boy panties in a twist, or not?"

Damon grits his teeth, and for a moment I think he's going to tell me where to shove it. But for whatever reason Damon actually answers,

"Stefan is out on a _**date**_" He says the word 'date' like it's a curse.

I splutter out a laugh and Damon glares at me.

"So, that's why you're upset, because your half Angel toy is finally getting some"

Damon's hand clenches so hard that his glass shatters all over the bar. He grits out,

"Stefan is not a_** toy**_ Katherine. And I am **not** _upset_...but..."

I peer at him,

"But..."

Damon doesn't answer for a long time. But I'm not bothered by that, I can sit here all night waiting. Damon and I have always been like that, it's a constant battle of wills between us.

He looks right at me as he bursts out finally,

"But Stefan is**_ mine_ **God damn it!"

I'm a little surprised by that admission. Not so much the anger or blind passion behind it, but the actual declaration itself. Damon has never really been the possessive type. Sure, like all men, he didn't like it when he felt he was losing to another man, whether he be losing a woman or a game of pool, it made no difference.

But this time Damon seems to be genuinely serious. He thinks of that half Angel vamp as _**his**_.

Well, fuck, who would have thought that Damon Salvatore would fall prey to the big innocent wide eyed gaze of a freakin' Angel.

Stefan may only be half, but it still counts in my book.

"You're an idiot" is all I say in response.

This time Damon doesn't even bother glaring or snapping back at me, he just sighs in resignation and says,

"Yeah, I know"

But he doesn't really know. He can't possibly. Because if he did, then he'd be out of this town within the hour.

No good can come of falling for an Angel.

It may seem like Damon has all the power, that it's him breaking Stefan's heart. But the truth is Damon would be the one broken by the end of it all. That's just the way it is. And the sooner both of them wake the hell up and realise how ridiculous they're being, the better.

**Stefan's P.O.V**

"That movie was bloody awful!" Kol exclaims.

I nod in agreement,

"I know! Humans have the strangest ideas about the supernatural"

Kol shrugs and gives me a teasing smile,

"What? Are you saying you _**don't**_ sparkle in the sun? I...I am shocked...and appalled Stefan Salvatore. I feel like you have misrepresented yourself to me."

I roll my eyes and push his shoulder playfully,

"Whatever Demon prince, where exactly are your horns?"

Kol pokes his tongue out at me,

"Hey, I don't give you grief about _**your**_ lack of halo Stefan"

I laugh, letting loose for the first time tonight. I don't even flinch when Kol slides his hand into mine, twining out fingers together almost sneakily.

Our date has been going better than I thought it would. I was actually kind of dreading it after what happened with Damon today.

"Sorry again for...for what my brother did to you today Kol-"

Kol shakes his head,

"Hey, listen, it's ok Stefan-"

"No it's not ok. I should have tried harder to stop him and-"

Kol pulls me to an abrupt stop in the middle of the pretty much empty street. His arms resting on my shoulders as he leans in close to me and meets my eyes.

I have to try really hard to control my power of seeing people's death when I look into their eyes. I hate it, but if I concentrate then I can usually block it out. The only person whose death I haven't been able to see at all is, weirdly, Damon's. For whatever reason my power just doesn't work on him. I have no idea why.

Although I'm grateful. Even just the thought of Damon dying makes me want to be sick.

Kol says,

"You're not responsible for what Damon did Stefan. You can't control your brother when he behaves like a psycho-"

I shake my head fiercely,

"Damon isn't a psycho Kol. He just does things sometimes that are a little crazy...he's...he's impulsive...that's all"

Stefan sighs when I try to pull away from him, and he catches my eye,

"Stop Stefan, I'm sorry for saying that, it was too far" he looks at me strangely for a moment and murmurs, "You still defend him even after all the shit he's done..."

I stand firm and unapologetic,

"He's my brother" is all I say in response.

Kol nods absently,

"I get it Stefan. I defend my brothers to other people when they act like they've gone off their rocker, which is most of the time really"

I relax a little at that. Maybe _**all** _my feelings towards Damon aren't wildly innapropriate. I'm still allowed to care about him and defend him. That's just what brothers do.

The whole getting hard whenever I'm in his presence thing however...yeah, that's when the not normal part comes in.

"I like you Stefan" Kol says suddenly and I'm dramatically brought back to the present.

I try for a sincere smile, hoping that Kol won't sense where my thoughts trailed off to.

"I like you too Kol"

Of course I like him, he's my friend.

Like he can actually read my thoughts Kol shakes his head in exasperation and says,

"No Stefan, you muppet, I mean I fancy the pants off you. I mean I want us to be together"

I blush furiously and bite my lip,

"Uh, we are together, right now"

Kol arches an eyebrow at me,

"Well now you're just playing dumb on purpose. You know I want you. And I think maybe you want me...right?"

I bite my lip hard and nod like the socially stunted person I am,

"Yeah, I do...fancy you Kol, I really do, but..."

"But I'm not your brother" Kol finishes when I trail off.

I wince at his choice of wording. Putting it like that makes it sound really bad.

_It is really bad, you idiot_, I scold myself.

I shrug helplessly, unsure of what the right thing is to say. I don't want to lie to Kol, but at the same time I'm so tired of my feelings for Damon ruining my every other chance at a real connection with somebody.

Kol nods, real life sympathy in his dark eyes. They're so different to Damon's.

Maybe that's a good thing.

"I...can't say I understand Stefan...because I really don't. I mean, I love my brothers, even when they act like complete tossers, but...I can't imagine ever wanting to fuck them...that's just...kind of..."

"Gross" I supply with a small smile.

Stefan snickers under his breathe,

"Yeah, pretty much...but I'm not judging you ok, it's different for you, I do understand **that** at least"

I press my mouth to his then, wanting the physical connection between us again to help me push past all this crap with Damon. I don't want to love Damon anymore.

I want to move on with my life.

_But you want Damon more than your life, still-_that stupid voice inside my head whispers.

I'm starting to hate the voices inside my own head.

I am losing my mind.

And it's all Damon's fucking fault!

Why does he have to be so...why did I have to fall in love with him all those years ago?

I open my mouth when Kol runs his hot tongue along my bottom lip. He slips inside and uses all his apparent skill to kiss me fully and with all the passion he has stored up side him.

He doesn't kiss like Damon. But...no one could. Only Damon throws himself into everything head first, including sex. He knows how to just let go and be in the moment; something I really need to learn to do one of these days.

...

When I get home later that night after a few more make out sessions with Kol along the way, including a very heated moment in an alley near the town square, I can feel that Damon is home.

I almost want to run away. But I tell myself not to be such a baby.

It was Damon who pushed me away, he has no right to make me feel so uncomfortable for choosing to go out with someone else.

But a stupid part of me still worries about seeing his handsome face twisted in pain at the thought of me with Kol. I hate making Damon hurt, it makes me hurt in turn, even when we were kids I hated seeing him upset.

I think about running to my room to avoid him, but quickly dismiss that idea as too childish to even consider. Damon isn't a monster, I don't need to be afraid of him.

I make my way into and through the boarding house. I know Zach's gone out of town for a few days, and I don't know where Alaric, the Hunter Damon trusts, is, and I'm not all that interested as long as it isn't sitting on Damon's dick.

Woah...was that catty?...shit I think it was damn it!

I know Damon's here though. I can just feel it deep down to my bones somehow...

"Stefan" I hear Damon call my name from the living room and I wince.

Ah, shit, what do I do?

I can't ignore it, I'm almost positive Damon would just come after me anyway.

I suck in a harsh breathe and go into the living room. I find Damon leaning against a book shelf with a glass of something in his hand.

The look on his face is one of both anguish and contemplation...if that's even possible.

He looks up at me slowly, his pale eyes flickering in the firelight, making him look far less human than he usually does.

Damon's appraisal of my body is obvious and unapologetic. I don't know what he's checking for...maybe signs of Kol.

"Have a good time?" Damon asks coldly, causing my heart to flip painfully in my chest.

I clench and unclench my hands restlessly,

"Yes, I did actually, not that it's any of your business Day"

Damon's eyes actually soften and he moves, like a panther stalking its prey, towards me. That smooth and sleek body moving silent as a shadow. It's way too sexy that he can move like that without even trying.

"Stef, baby, I'm sorry about today. I was just...angry" Damon practically purrs in my ear, setting his glass down and pressing me up against the wall.

This is becoming a habit with us.

And I don't mind one bit.

There is something seriously wrong with me.

I swallow audibly and flatten myself against the wall, trying to put at least some space between us, even it is only a few inches worth.

"**_Don't_**" Damon snaps quick like lightening hitting the ground.

I look into his blazing blue fire eyes and ask,

"Don't what Day...I don't understand what you _**want**_ from me!"

Damon trails the back of his hand down my cheek and I shiver in complete and undeniable pleasure from that small amount of contact alone, He grits his jaw, as if fighting something back,

"Baby, you know what I want from you...I took it two years ago, and I want so bad to take it again...but...I...won't"

I feel hot burning tears well up behind my eyes and try desperately not to let them fall. I need at least some pride in this situation, even if I feel like I'm breaking inside. I shake my head and whisper back, although the words sounds choked out with the intensity of the emotion behind it,

"_**Day**_...you didn't _take_ it two years ago...I _**gave**_ it to you. I didn't want to give it to anyone else. It was always you. Always."

...

_**Special shout out to-BroodyCheery323, chhavi and PLK Susie-Thank you so much for your reviews! Love them! xxx**_

_**So, please let me know what you all thought of this chapter and what you think it means for the future of our favourite forbidden couple ;) xxx**_

_**Thanks so much for reading! xxx**_


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